Rick Reilly: Oh, to be Brady

Matthew Emmons/US Presswire

It's in vogue to sling arrows at Tom Brady, but who wouldn't want his outrageous life? ESPN.com columnist Rick Reilly, for one, has his hand raised on that score:

I want to be Tom Brady.

I want a cleft in my chin you can store pistachios in.

I want to be 6-foot-4 and cool as the Anchorage DMV and have eyes so green that when I pass, the angels have to hold on to something.

I want to be Tom Brady and have an Indianapolis policeman invite me to break the law, as happened Monday night.

"I got to drive down a one-way street in the opposite direction to park to go to dinner," he said." I was driving to the restaurant, and the cop saw us and said, 'Just pull right up.' That was the coolest thing."

People, I'm begging here.

It's fashionable to dump on Tom Brady lately. Baltimore Ravens DE Haloti Ngata says Tom Brady whines to refs about being hit. Baltimore's Terrell Suggs calls Brady's three Super Bowl titles "questionable." ESPNNewYork.com's Rich Cimini wrote a column this week headlined, "Tom Brady not as great as advertised."

Not as advertised?