How the U.S. could have won Ryder Cup

Was it Davis Love III's fault that the U.S. blew a huge lead? Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images

The U.S. choked away the Ryder Cup. Whose fault was it? Much of the blame is being directed at team captain Davis Love III. He just didn’t stand there alongside the course as well as Jose Maria Olazabal did. Anyone who knows anything about golf knows that.

But maybe it’s not right to blame a person who has almost zero impact on the competition. To fairly blame -- or credit -- a Ryder Cup captain, we need to give him more control. Here’s how:


Give each Ryder Cup captain five timeouts per day. Timeouts could be used for any number of reasons. Want to halt the opponent’s momentum? Call a timeout. Want to pump up the team with an inspiring golf speech? Timeout. Want to call a special eagle play? Timeout. Is Martin Kaymer about to pull the trigger on a Ryder Cup-clinching putt? TIMEOUT. You’ve been iced, Kaymer.


It’s hard to make the case that Ryder Cup captains have any impact on the outcome if they can’t shuffle the lineups once play begins. What worth would an MLB manager have if he couldn’t pull a starting pitcher? None at all, especially in the American League. Ryder Cup captains should be able to replace players, too. Is Steve Stricker choking? Finish the match with the team’s closer: Tiger Woods.


Golf has no referees. Players officiate themselves. Come on. What kind of system is that? Everyone tries to cheat in sports. Football players hold and hope they don’t get caught. Baseball players claim they caught balls they didn’t. Soccer players dive. Basketball players dive even more. If golfers aren’t cheating, then maybe we have to question whether golf is even a real sport. And that is a ludicrous thought.

No, we need to give Ryder Cup captains some challenge flags. You’re claiming a birdie, Rory McIlroy? Video evidence shows a quadruple bogey. CHEATER.


A captain isn’t a captain if he can’t tell his players what to do and how to play. No real captain would let Jim Furyk take the course with a swing looking that ridiculous. Get out on the range and learn to swing right! What do you have over there? A belly putter? Not on this team, young man. We putt like men.


Like a NASCAR crew chief or NFL head coach, we need our Ryder Cup captains in the ears of the players. The golfers wouldn’t need caddies if the captain was talking to them, giving them advice and keeping them positive, with YOU DA MAN! And GET IN THE HOLE!

Did Davis Love yell either of those things even once all weekend? No. He didn’t. What a disgrace. Worst. Captain. Ever.