This week's #Cashtag is sentences that have #NeverBeenUttered. For instance, "Shaq, go shoot the technical for us."
Or, "Ran into Tim Tebow at FlashDancers last night."
Or, "Tiger, I'd like you to meet my sister."
Tweet a good one to me @ReillyRick and you could win a whopping $7.93, the approximate cost of a grilled cheese sandwich, fries and Coke at Denny's. (Tip not included.)
Be sure to include the #NeverBeenUttered hashtag or I won't see it. And it's got to be sports or you've got no chance. Because while "My moral compass is Lindsay Lohan" is a good one, this is a sports deal.
And now for the winner of last week's #Cashtag -- #MyLamestJockMoment.
7th grade swim meet. I won the 50M freestyle race only to be informed it was the breast stroke event.
Wes Katagi @WesKatagi
I'm following you now Wes, so DM me your address and my wife will send you a check out of our account for $7.93. If you actually do get a cheese sandwich somewhere, please have the decency to send me a picture of you eating it.
VERY GOOD BUT WINNERS OF ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
In 9th grade, I was all alone on a fast break, and I passed it up to a teammate, who ended up being the ref.
Nick Hanson @hanson_nick
1983 pickup game in Seattle. Went up for jumper; Danny Vranes blocked it off my head. Still have mark.
Greg Howard @GregoryHoward
The time I was flirting with a girl at baseball and than made a great catch...with my left eye.
Phillip Resnick @PhillipResnick
When my coach benched me and said "It's not your fault. It's my fault for having you in there."
Jerry Larkin @jerry_larkin
The time in HS I made all 3 outs of the inning as my team batted around
Nick Hodgins @NickHodgins
College Golf match, first hole, my practice swing divot knocks ball off tee—of my opponent mid-swing.
Rob Kemp @rfk2012
I airmailed a throw to first and hit a grandma in the face from shortstop. They didn't start the inning until the ambulance left
Adam Korson @scotslb32
Cruised in for an easy layup on my own basket in a JV basketball game. Wondered why there was no defense...
Bennett Evan @bennettevan
FAKE BUT FUNNY
The time I struck out looking in teeball.
Tyler Woods @W_Toods
(via Ahmad Bradshaw) When I scored the Super Bowl winning touchdown
Nick Sirois @siroisn
"I sneezed, threw my back out, refused a PED test and forgot the English language" -Sammy Sosa.
Zak! Failla @zakfailla
Having my golf ball retriever regripped...
Dan Dal Degan @Triple_Deee
STILL PRETTY GOUDA
My first triple double. (turnovers, minutes played, shots blocked)
Graham Waldrop @GrahamWaldrop
During halftime football coach speech, I got up to grab a water bottle. Coach yelled "40, did you even play?"
Playing football in front of my middle school, I caught a pass, turned up field and ran into a HUGE tree! 1 concussion later....
Jesse Brown @jesserb306
HS BBall tie game ... thought clock said 3sec, but was 13. Heaved long 3, fast break other way for layup & loss
Nate Golomb @nategolomb
The fact that my throwing up before every football game became a good luck ritual for my team
Chase Harris @ChaseNTheHole
Playing Bethpage and shot one under car. Sliced into parking lot.
kayden deratter @kayden_knows
Playing street football last week, laid out a 4 year old. Lamest moment ... for her. For me it was awesome.
On senior night I tore off my warmups.. forgot to put my bball shorts on. In front of the student section.
Thomas Kierl @kierl_t
I got frustrated with my play in street bball. Slammed ball down. It bounces up. nails my nose. Blood everywhere
Ethan Grau @TUBBSHawks
Hit for the anti cycle: strikeout, groundout, flyout, lineout. More than once
sam lubman @samlubman59
Right fielder makes amazing catch, coach says to me: "Wow. Glad I took you out. Aren't you?"
Brian Wallheimer @wally3298
I was throwing BP in high school and threw the ball over the entire backstop.
Richard Bazemore @pheasant_hunter
When I pulled my right hamstring running to first base followed by me pulling my left hamstring rounding for second.
Preston Young @pyou10
I had more sportsmanship awards than baskets in High School Basketball
Troy Heffron @troy_tweets
I was cut from the h.s. golf team after the first 3 holes of tryouts. Tryouts were supposed to last 3 days
AND, OF COURSE, THE TRADITIONAL ONE FROM MY BROTHER
My brother's team lost the game when I miscalled a "foul" ball "fair" ... Mom hollered "kill the ump!"
@Peachrules (John Reilly)
His entire umpiring career lasted that one game.