Throw a Guy in the Lake: 06/10/10

You and I grew up using our hands to do things. Landon Donovan grew up using his feet. My God, can this guy use his feet.

For the Landon Donovan "Homecoming" (Thursday at 9 p.m. on ESPN) we decided to let him show you. Before he left for South Africa to play for USA in the World Cup, we set up a real challenge at his own Redlands East Valley High School in Redlands, Calif. We rented an entire carnival midway and made a bet: I'd use my hands and he'd use his feet. Loser goes in the dunk tank.

Balloon Break: Me throwing darts, him kicking soccer balls. He won.

Milk Bottle: Me knocking over pewter milk bottles with a softball, him knocking them over with soccer kicks. I won. (1-1 now)

Radar Gun: Me throwing a baseball as hard as I can, him kicking a soccer ball, rather nonchalantly, I thought. Me: 52 mph. Him: 58 mph right-footed, 52 mph left-footed, while laughing. He won. (1-2)

Football Toss: Me throwing a little football through a tiny hole in a wooden cutout of a receiver, him kicking a little soccer ball into that same tiny hole. I won, but The Homecoming Gaming Commission ruled I cheated and declared Donovan the winner.

To the 700-gallon dunk tank I trudged, vowing to file a grievance.

He stood maybe 75 feet away and hit the five-inch target on the first kick.

The water was very cold.

May an Algerian use his butt for a bicycle kick.

Homecoming: Donovan dunks Rick Reilly on the first try!

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