Page 2 Awards for Mediocrity

Wed, Dec 30

Honoring the decade's best players and teams is a relatively easy task, because these are the folks who won the titles, grabbed the headlines and carved their names in the record books. Likewise, dishonoring the worst is not heavy lifting. After all, just ask yourself, "Who embarrassed themselves in the past 10 years? Who made us laugh? Who signed a seven-year, $126 million contract with the Toronto Blue Jays and then started playing like a late model Kevin Mitchell?"

Best and worst, we know where to find you -- and you always get your due. But what about the mediocre? We're thinking of those folks who spent the past decade residing in the vast middle ground between sublimity and futility. The well-known players who never made an All-Star team, yet rarely made fans throw their remotes. The teams that never sniffed a title, yet rarely sniffed the basement, either. Why should they exit the decade without a little recognition? They shouldn't.

Consequently, we present the Page 2 Awards for Mediocrity (2000-2009).

Most mediocre National League team: Los Angeles Dodgers.

Most mediocre American League team: Toronto Blue Jays.

Most mediocre boxing division: Heavyweight.

Most mediocre sports month: February (unless the Winter Olympics are on).

Most mediocre college football team: Notre Dame.

Most mediocre Yankees player: Melky Cabrera.

Most mediocre sports column: This one, obviously.

Most mediocre NBA team: Houston Rockets.

Most mediocre college football conference: The ACC.

Most mediocre NFL team: Dallas Cowboys.

Most mediocre, repeatable sports story: Will the Indianapolis Colts go undefeated this season?

Most mediocre Super Bowl: None.

Most mediocre World Series: Boston Red Sox over Colorado Rockies in 2007.

Most mediocre holiday: New Year's Eve.