Readers: Unlikely Thanksgiving prayers

Originally Published: November 24, 2011
By Jerry Greene | Page 2

First, a moment of silence for all the turkeys who have given their lives so that we may gorge on Thursday. Oh, the pigs, too. And the tofus, although I really don't know what a tofu looks like.

There is much to be thankful for if you are a sports fan. Yes, we have had scandals -- including one that made us sick. And we have one major sport that has postponed its season and may even cancel it. Apparently the various sides can't agree on how to divide our money.

Despite all that, we love sports and benefit from sports. It is the icing on our cake. It is worthy. It may not be what we do but it is what we love to watch and discuss. And take our shots …

Now to this week's list, which is irrelevantly thankful on this special day:

Top 10 Unlikely Sports Thanksgiving Prayers

10. "The Indianapolis Colts: We give thanks that no one scored on us during our bye week," said Scott G. of Rockford, Ill.

9. "All NBA players: We give thanks for all the taxes we don't have to pay," said Patrick C. of Atlanta.

8. "Green Bay fans: Thanks to all the Cleveland Browns fans who voted Peyton Hillis on the cover of Madden instead of Aaron Rodgers," said Karl L. of Panama City Beach, Fla.

7. "All NFL punters: Please let Devin Hester trip getting off the team bus and suffer an ankle sprain -- a high ankle sprain," said Ben M. of Peoria, Ill.

6. "Chiefs fans: May the beautiful weather we have enjoyed at Arrowhead Stadium continue so we may savor the best tailgating in the world -- and may the game not cause us to lose our lunch," said David K. of Fort Smith, Ark.

5. "Kris Humphries: Thanks for the paychecks from Kardashian Productions and the, uh, perks that went with it," said Fred M. of Los Angeles.

4. "Tiger Woods: Thanks that no one mentioned my two-year Thanksgiving 'anniversary,'" said Peggy C. of Oviedo, Fla.

3. "Jets Coach Rex Ryan: Thanks for the &^^%$# defeats and &%$#^ Sanchez and ^%$#$% Belichick. Amen and let's eat," said Lisa H. of Hamilton, Mont.

2. "Chicago Bears Coach Lovie Smith: Please, oh football gods, send us a quarterback with lightning in his arm and thunder in his voice -- or at least Brett Favre," said Justin M. of Parts Unknown, Ohio.

1. "Tiny Tim Tebow: God bless us everyone!" said Doug E. of Altamonte Springs, Fla.

Look at the final four principal names: Woods, Ryan, Favre and Tebow. Wouldn't you love to be sharing a turkey dinner with them today?

Finally, I've mentioned it before and am about to mention it again: These are reader-generated lists so you do all the work. I am thankful and appreciative.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Jerry Greene is a regular contributor to and can be reached at