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Welcome back to the College Hoops DVR, in which -- depending on whim -- we look backward or forward or just let things play, always in quick succession.
STOP: Xavier's Jordan Crawford, who famously dunked over LeBron James in a pickup game last summer, had 16 points and four assists in Saturday's Atlantic 10 grudge match versus Dayton. You'll have to take my word for it though, because all tape of the game has disappeared.
PLAY: In deference to the sensitivity surrounding mental illness in this country, the "Cameron Crazies" at Duke University would from now on like to be known as the "Cameron Morons."
FF: College basketball recently passed the NFL to become the most popular sport in the United States, so the NCAA plans to capitalize on its status -- the first step being the creation of the NCAA Hoops Channel, which will broadcast the week's best matchups and be available to 0.2 percent of the nation's cable subscribers.
PLAY: Tired of being the "other" freshman guard at the University of Kentucky, Eric Bledsoe has asked his agent to demand a trade.
PLAY: Reality television creation Heidi Montag, star of "The Hills," says she's addicted to plastic surgery. The 23-year-old -- seen here in the days before her worldwide fame -- reportedly had 10 procedures done in one day, and is now largely unrecognizable.
PAUSE: O.J. Mayo says he'll aid USC's internal investigation of alleged misdeeds committed during his tenure, if they pony up and pay him handsomely.
PLAY: Kansas State's Frank Martin, a national coach of the year candidate before he backhanded one of his players during a TV timeout last week, is now a candidate for several college football head-coaching vacancies.
REW: After learning that Julio Inglesias quit "rabbit-like sex" 15 years ago, Pittsburgh's Jamie Dixon called Inglesias a quitter "who'd have no place on my team."
FF: The NBA is considering a change to its eligibility requirements. Instead of requiring players to attend one year of college before declaring for the NBA draft, they might only ask them to pass organic chemistry.
REW: Ohio State's Evan Turner, having just returned from a back injury, accidentally smashed his finger with a hammer over the weekend. X-rays were negative, but pictures showed considerable swelling.
FF: Alcorn State is one of only two winless teams remaining in Division I. So if you're driving through Pine Bluff, Ark., Monday night, check out the game between Alcorn State and Arkansas-Pine Bluff. Unless, of course, there's something else going on in Pine Bluff on Monday night.
FF: Inspired by the recent developments on NBC late-night television, former Texas Tech coach Bobby Knight says he's returning to his old job with the Red Raiders and that the current coach, Pat Knight, will get nothing and like it.
FF: With the sudden onslaught of half-court shots being made in college hoops, officials say it might be time to move the mid-court line back a few feet, because the half-court heave just isn't what it used to be.
PLAY: In its ongoing effort to lower expectations, Purdue lost to Northwestern on Saturday, the third straight loss for the former top-five team.
PLAY: Fast fact about the first-year coach of Southeast Missouri State: his name is Dickey Nutt.
REW: Mark Macon, the interim coach at scandal-plagued Binghampton, had some homespun wisdom after the team's hard-fought loss to Boston University, the America East preseason favorite: "We were never trying to sneak up on anybody anyway. Why? We want people to know we're coming. When I knock on your door, I want you to know who it is. If you don't, I might steal something. We're not trying to surprise anybody. Like I said, if I knock on your door and you ain't there, it's your fault your TV got stolen, not mine."
Somebody remove the "interim" from that man's job title. He's obviously found his niche as a molder of young minds.
- REW: A look back at a recent sporting development
- PAUSE: Where things are on hold
- PLAY: Where things are ongoing
- STOP: Where things have come to an end
- FF: A look ahead at a possible sporting development
Cam Martin is a contributor to Page 2. He previously worked for the Greenwich (Conn.) Time and The (Stamford, Conn.) Advocate, and has written online for CBS Sports and Comcast SportsNet New England. You can contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org.