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'Whisker Wars' Rates Athlete Beards

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Court McGee, MMA

Photograph By Anne-Marie Sorvin/US Presswire

Alex LaRoche: B+. Court is one of my favorite UFC bros since the Ice Man retired. If he would only grow that mustache out, he could soak up more blood.

Jack Passion: B. People always say, "Jack, why is your beard so red!?" Well, obviously it's because it's drenched in blood. Just like Court McGee's in this picture. Important: People with beards kick ass.

Miletus Callehan: A+. I can't tell by all the blood on the upper lip, yet I do believe Court is rocking the Donegal. For this he gets an A+ for sporting a beard that's a symbol of pacifism.