Buzz That Was: One-upmanship overload

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Just when it seemed to U.S. fans that all was right with the World Cup, Cristiano Ronaldo reared his lightning-bolt-shaved head.

In case you were too busy wondering if Kristin Cavallari or Audrina Patridge scored an invite to Lauren Conrad's bachelorette party and missed out on sports, we've got you covered. Here's what everyone else was talking about this weekend.

Lolo Jones: On top of the World to down in the dumps

After rallying from a 1-0 deficit to take a 2-1 lead over Portugal, the U.S. men's soccer team was 30 seconds away from advancing to the next round at the World Cup. And then Ronaldo happened. SIGH.

The global superstar's assist to Silvestre Varela resulted in a game-tying goal. Womp, womp. The match was over just seconds later and the U.S. was forced to settle for a draw, otherwise known as an outcome not good enough to automatically advance. The U.S. must now wait until after its showdown with Germany on Thursday to learn its tournament fate. The elation-turned-heartbreak was felt by fans across the country, but perhaps best summed up in one Instagram video from Lolo Jones.

What an AWFUL/CRUSHING/DEVASTATING/AMAZING (if you're a Portuguese fan or Ronaldo) difference 30 seconds makes.

Money player

American football may not be anywhere near as popular as soccer in most of the world, and yet somehow Johnny Manziel has still found a way to influence the beautiful game. During Algeria's dominant performance against South Korea, Islam Slimani scored a goal and then promptly busted out Manziel's famous money celebration.

No word if Slimani partied with frat bros, bikini-clad women and Rob Gronkowski after the game.

Michelle Wie gets help from her famous friends

Eleven-year-old Lucy Li got most of the attention during the first two rounds of the U.S. Women's Open, but it was a former child prodigy who stole the show ... and the title. Michelle Wie, playing in her 11th Open, nabbed her first major title with a two-shot win over Stacy Lewis. While her play throughout the tournament was impressive, the win was really due to Keegan Bradley's yardage books from the men's tournament last week. According to Keegan Bradley, that is.

Rickie Fowler was slightly less credit-stealing, but he did promise Wie he would "pay up" for some bet those zany, rich golfers waged.

A major win, a $720,000 winner's paycheck AND bragging rights over Rickie Fowler? Yeah, I think Michelle Wie had a pretty decent weekend.

Take that, 50 Cent

ADORABLE CENTENARIAN ALERT: On Friday, 101-year-old Rosemary Depler threw out the first pitch at the St. Louis Cardinals game. Just 13 years younger than the team itself, Depler has witnessed all 11 of the organization's World Series titles. She told the PA announcer that she was debating whether to go with the curveball or a sinker, but ultimately opted for a pretty impressive underhand toss that made it right to the pitcher. ARE YOU TAKING NOTES, 50 CENT?

Just what the doctor ordered for Joel Embiid?

After undergoing foot surgery on Friday, former Kansas star and once-projected No. 1 NBA draft pick Joel Embiid likely just wanted to relax and catch up on "Orange Is the New Black" over the weekend while he recuperated. But fellow projected lottery pick Jabari Parker had other plans, as he casually dropped by in a full suit with Oreos, medication and a camera. So, not totally staged at all or anything.

I'm sure Embiid was just thrilled to see his casual acquaintance stop by and rub in his good health and ability to attend Thursday's draft in person. That surely made him feel better!

Serena Williams, Caroline Wozniacki take BFF routine to Wimbledon

Serena Williams and Caroline Wozniacki continued their global BFF tour over the weekend. While in England ahead of Wimbledon, the duo grabbed dinner, caught up on the seemingly four whole days they had been apart and -- perhaps most shockingly -- didn't post any pictures of their evening on social media. GASP! HOW IS THE WORLD STILL SPINNING???

Clearly they both either dropped the camera portion of their phones into water or were having really, really bad hair days.

This little piggy went to the mall

Washington Wizards center Marcin Gortat has been enjoying his offseason downtime in his native Poland by doing typical things like eating, sleeping and bringing his pet pig to the mall on a leash. You know, the usual.

I'm just going to leave this one here. Feel free to draw your own conclusions.

See something worthy of inclusion on social media or just want to comment on one of today's stories? Send it my way on Twitter, @darcymaine_espn.

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