Buzz That Was: Seven stages of grief
In case you were too busy raising $70,000 on Kickstarter to make potato salad and missed out on sports, we've got you covered. Here's what everyone else was talking about last night.
Heartbreak in Brazil
Widely considered the favorite entering the World Cup, Brazil proved its supporters wrong on Tuesday with a 7-1 loss in the semifinals to Germany. That is not a typo. The home squad actually lost 7-1. It was one of the country's worst losses, matching only a 6-0 defeat against Uruguay in 1920. The Germans scored a record-breaking five goals in the first 29 minutes, including a six-minute stretch in which they scored FOUR TIMES.
Everyone on the planet seemed to be in disbelief. Thankfully, Peyton Manning and the Denver Broncos became Twitter's favorite target to help make sense of the lopsided scene.
Peyton knows.. pic.twitter.com/1koaLgKHQq- NFL Memes (@NFL_Memes) July 8, 2014
I feel like this is a replay of the Super Bowl.- Sydney Leroux (@sydneyleroux) July 8, 2014
But the shocking and absolute dismantling of the Brazilian team was perhaps best captured by the tears of fans in the stands. Their grief helped contribute to Twitter's most tweeted-about event EVER -- the game peaked at 580,000 tweets per minute. Twerk on over, Miley Cyrus!
And, if you're not quite finished pouring salt in the very open wounds of Brazil fans, you'll likely enjoy this topical gift from the Internet gods. How many goals did Germany score, LeBron James? Not one ... Not two ... I think you get the idea.
Breakfast of ambassadors
While Waffle House started the great waffle war last week before the United States' match against Belgium, it was the American ambassador to the United Kingdom who had to finish it. Matthew Barzun had a friendly wager on the game with Belgium's U.K. ambassador, Guy Trouveroy. After the devastating American loss, Barzun was forced to make a pancake breakfast for Trouveroy.
Cheer up, Matty. If this whole ambassador thing doesn't work out, I think you really have a future in breakfast production. You hiring, Waffle House?
While Germany had seven ridiculous goals in the semifinal win over Brazil, somehow none of them get the honor of "goal of the week." That distinction easily goes to Lauren Holiday of FC Kansas City. During a 5-0 thrashing of Sky Blue FC, the midfielder scored from a corner kick. This one needs to be seen -- many, many times on loop -- to be believed.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE???
Brittney Griner and Sinbad
Some people have all the luck. On Sunday, Brittney Griner threw down an impressive dunk in the Phoenix Mercury's win over the Los Angeles Sparks. On Tuesday, she was named a starter for next week's All-Star Game. But while those are great feats and all, it's her celebrity encounter that will really elicit the most screams of jealousy. While at the airport on Tuesday, Griner ran into ... Sinbad. Insert your favorite "First Kid" and "Jingle All the Way" quotes here.
Guess who?!? pic.twitter.com/klxg45bpFK- Brittney Griner (@brittneygriner) July 8, 2014
Could someone please start a Kickstarter for these two to have a reality show or a buddy comedy? Or at least to make some kind of picnic food together? Thanks in advance.
In sad news for anyone who has been desperately holding out hope for an invitation to Cincinnati Bengals QB AJ McCarron and famous person Katherine Webb's upcoming nuptials, we are now just four days away from the WEDDING EVENT OF THE YEAR. Just kidding. It's not even the event of the month, thanks to that selfish Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson. However, it is definitely the wedding of the week. So there's that. Because Webb just can't wait for the big day ... and has to find new ways to promote herself after their wedding-themed reality show was reportedly axed, she tweeted out a photo of the invitation on Tuesday.
Getting excited pic.twitter.com/0IHQYn4FBF- Katherine Webb (@_KatherineWebb) July 8, 2014
Because who doesn't want to see a picture of a total stranger's half-invitation to a wedding they're not invited to?
See something worthy of inclusion on social media or just want to comment on one of today's stories? Send it my way on Twitter, @darcymaine_espn.