Ali Contest
For the other 51 weeks of the year, you can call him the Sports Guy. For this week, however, Page 2's Bill Simmons admits he's just a New Englander with a bad case of Patriots fever. Simmons won't even try to hide his biases as he offers his random observations on the NFL playoffs.

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It might take a whole team of mental-health professionals to explain why Mike Tyson does the things he does. Whether Iron Mike gave in to a Napoleonic complex, fear or some bizarre voices in his head, Page 2's Ralph Wiley knows that time's up for the ex-heavyweight champ. Take Wiley's quiz and see if you can explain Tyson's bizarre behavior.

Mystery Photo Sportoon
Apparently, they play a different brand of golf in the European, Australasian and Asian PGA tours, judging by this week's Page 2 Mystery Photo of Lee Westwood. Send us a note to help explain what this Masked Man is really doing on the links.
Agent Mulder isn't working on the "X Files" anymore, so maybe we could enlist his help to investigate possible conspiracies in the NFL playoffs. For now, we'll have to settle for Page 2 cartoonist Kurt Snibbe's sneak peek at the league's secret files.

While ESPN determines the "World's Sexiest Athlete," Page 2 listed our choices for the sexiest athletes from yesteryear. We asked for your nominations, and we've compiled your list of the sexiest retired athletes. Check out our readers' top 10 and be sure to vote in the poll to crown the sexiest athlete from the past.

10]  Joe Namath
"Why my mom is a football fan and how I ended up being born a Jets fan."
8] tie   Tonya Harding
"Beat me, whip me, make me write bad checks."
8] tie   Manon Rheaume
"My jaw has never hit the ground harder than when Manon walked out of shadows to sit next to David Letterman."
6] tie   Carling Bassett
"Good-looking, and her father owned a brewery!"
6] tie   Summer Sanders
"Why else did anyone watch MTV's 'Sandblast' and Nickelodeon's 'Figure it Out'?"

Sunday Rams 12 Eagles 50
Sunday Steelers Patriots 37
Friday T-Wolves 2 Raptors 193
Friday Celtics Sixers 184
Friday Lakers Spurs 193
All Times ET -- Bold indicates home team
Complete Line

Got a comment about something you've seen on Page 2?
Here's your chance to sound off to the editors and columnists.

Raiders fans shouldn't blame the zebras, Chris Connelly writes, they should look under the silver-and-black visor for the real reason Oakland lost in the snow.

The NBA dunk contest's present doesn't live up to its storied past of Dr. J, Spud Webb, 'Nique and Air Jordan, so Bill Simmons has a solution for fixing All-Star Weekend.

Bob Halloran remembers the days -- back when he trudged to school 20 miles uphill both ways in the snow -- when you couldn't keep kids off sports fields, courts and rinks.

We watch the NFL to see great players make great plays. Page 2's Ralph Wiley says instant replay is threatening to ruin all that.
If your favorite writer isn't on Page 2 today, click here to check out our full roster of columnists.

If the Rams really want to confuse the Eagles on Sunday, maybe they should line up hip-hop artist Nas, left, in the backfield next to Marshall Faulk. Five Page 2 readers say it's hard to tell the two apart. Browse our archives of past pairs or click here to submit a future duo.

Golf: PGA Phoenix Open
4 p.m. ET, USA
If at first you don't succeed, Ty Tryon, try again.
Tennis: Australian Open
9:30 p.m. ET, ESPN
Capriati vs. Hingis: As usual, the women's championship is the best.
Spurs at Lakers
10:30 p.m. ET, Fox West
West rival San Antonio can kick slumping L.A. while it's down.
• Complete TV Listings

If you missed Page 2 over the last week, check out our back issues:
• Thurs., Jan. 24: Down the toilet
• Wed., Jan. 23: Insane replay
• Tues., Jan. 22: Being the Big Tuna
• Mon., Jan. 21: Snow Job
Other featured content:
• What's going down the toilet?
• Berman Files: Marshall Faulk
• Ask Mike Tyson, dietician
• Bizarre & Bogus
• Being Bill Parcells
Weekend Edition, Jan. 25-27, 2002