Being ... Jeremy Shockey
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Jeremy Shockey vowed to light up Bill Parcells and the Cowboys on Monday Night Football. The final numbers: two catches, eight yards and two dropped passes, including one gaffe for the ages in the end zone. So, what's on Shockey's mind now?


Being ... Manny Ramirez

Being ... Pete Rose

Being ... Mr. Met

Being ... Mike Piazza

Being Bobby Valentine

Being ... George Steinbrenner

Being ... Anna Kournikova

Being Roger Clemens

Being ... Randy Moss

Being ... Dr. Evil

Being ... Mike Tyson

Being Lamar Odom

Being Bob Knight

Being Mark McGwire

Being Derek Jeter

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"The Olsen twins turn 18 on June 13, 2004. Now ... I wonder what their mom looks like."

"So the Cowboys got lucky. But have you noticed how much better 'NFL Countdown' is this season?"

"Step one: Drop ball. Step two: Laugh. Step three: Run to equipment man and ask for gloves. Step four: Repeat step two."

"When a man can't open up to one of the most respected journalists in the country, what kind of a sad world do we live in?"

"I am so happy those Maxim guys never asked me to name my favorite TV show."

"Remember when applying product to your hair, always apply from the back to the front."

"The last thing you ever want to do is touch one of these with both hands at the same time. They're highly toxic."