So West Anchorage Post 1 was taking on host Juneau Post 25 in an American Legion baseball game when OHMYGOD THERE'S A BEAR BEHIND THE LEFT-FIELD FENCE EVERYBODY RUUUUNNNNNNNNNN!
Actually, everybody did not run. The players and fans just stood/sat and watched as the bear wandered around. After all, this is Alaska, which is tied with Florida for the U.S. lead in what is that terrifying creature and how did it get into this urban area?!?!?!
Q: Why did the mama bear scout the baseball game?
A: So it could finally teach the Cubs how to play.
(You guys can use that one.)