- UNI WATCH 2015
Best-Dressed Cities
Best-Dressed Cities
Of the 20 cities with three or more major pro sports teams (NFL, NBA, MLB, NHL), which has the best-looking batch? We crunch the numbers to calculate each city's highly scientific (or not) Uniform Numerical Index, or UNI, for the latest version of Uni Watch's Power Rankings.
(Note: Each team's uniform set was graded on a 1-10 scale)
- By Paul Lukas
- Illustrations by Robb Harskamp
- MORE: Best-dressed cities, two-team division
VIDEO: Why Boston wins
- 1. Boston (9.13)
Love 'em or hate 'em, there's no denying that Beantown's pro teams are very easy on the eyes. In fact, Boston's UNI score would have been even higher if the Patriots still had their Pat Patriot throwback in their wardrobe, or if the Celtics hadn't trotted out that miserable "pride" uniform last season. America's best-looking city, at least when measured by its athletics aesthetics.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Red Sox: 8, Patriots: 7.5, Bruins: 9.5, Celtics: 8.5, Intangibles: Bonus points for Fenway Park (2). Bonus point for the Celtics' parquet floor (1). Bonus point for Bill Belichick having a signature style (1), but it's cancelled out by that style being so unattractive (-1).UNI: 9.13- 2. Pittsburgh (8.83)
Pittsburgh's ranking is bolstered by the Steelers, who nabbed the top spot in our recent Uni Watch NFL Power Rankings. Solid looks from the Pirates (whose score would be higher if they didn't wear their black alternate tops so often) and Penguins, along with one of MLB's best-looking ballparks and a common municipal color scheme, were enough to vault the Steel City into the No. 2 spot. Still waiting for one of these teams to come up with an Andy Warhol-themed alternate jersey (his museum is a prime local attraction), but the Steelers' bumblebee throwbacks sort of qualify for that, right?
UNI WATCH SCORE: Pirates: 6.5, Steelers: 10, Penguins: 6.5, Intangibles: Bonus points for PNC Park (2), and for all three teams basing their color scheme on the colors of the Pittsburgh city flag (1.5). UNI: 8.83- 3. Chicago (8.5)
Turn on a game in the Windy City and you can be assured that at least one of the teams will be looking sharp. A lot of this is a function of stability: Each Chicago team has stuck with its basic look for at least a generation (even the White Sox, whose uniform program used to be a revolving door). Some folks might think this lack of change is boring. Others might say it's a refreshing dose of traditionalism. But Uni Watch views it as a citywide case study in "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."
UNI WATCH SCORE: Cubs: 9.5, White Sox: 7.5, Bears: 10, Bulls: 6.5, Blackhawks: 7, Intangibles: Bonus points for Wrigley Field (2). UNI: 8.5- 4. Philadelphia (8.38)
Philly fans may be notorious for booing, but they certainly have nothing to complain about when it comes to their teams' uniforms (including the 76ers' new set, which hasn't yet appeared on the court but looks very promising). From team to team, from top to bottom, not a stinker in the bunch. And the city's score will go even higher if the Eagles ever make the much-anticipated return to kelly green.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Phillies: 9.5, Eagles: 8, 76ers: 8, Flyers: 8. UNI: 8.38- 5. San Francisco Bay Area (8.17)
The Bay Area's uniforms are a study in contrasts. On the one hand, you have teams that look classic and timeless (Giants, Raiders). On the other, you have teams with a history of pushing the design envelope and expanding the uni-verse's parameters (A's, Warriors). And then you have a younger franchise that's finally settling into its look (Sharks). The one common denominator? On any given night, they all look at least pretty good, and often significantly better than that.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Giants: 7.5, A's: 9, 49ers: 6.5, Raiders: 10, Warriors: 8.5, Sharks: 5.5, Intangibles: Bonus points for AT&T Park (2). UNI: 8.17- 6. New York Metropolitan Area (6.94)
Given that Uni Watch HQ is located in NYC, it would be nice if the city ranked in the top five, but it's hard to maintain visual excellence across a nation-leading nine different uniform programs. Still, the Big Apple's teams are generally solid looking. Only the Yankees' and Rangers' looks qualify as elite, but all of the other New York-area uni sets are at least in the upper half of their respective leagues (and the Mets would rank significantly higher if they'd scrap some of their alternate jerseys and caps).
UNI WATCH SCORE: Mets: 6, Yankees: 9, Giants: 7, Jets: 6, Knicks: 6.5, Nets: 6.5, Rangers: 8.5, Islanders: 6, Devils: 7. UNI: 6.94- 7. Toronto (6.83)
Canada's lone entry in the rankings occupies a perfectly respectable spot in the top 10, buoyed in large part by the Blue Jays, whose current uniform set is a textbook example of how to update an older, dated look for contemporary use. Of course, it also doesn't hurt to have an old reliable such as the Maple Leafs in your portfolio. And even the Raptors, the city's least visually distinguished team, have made some strides with their newly unveiled set.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Blue Jays: 9, Raptors: 5.5, Maple Leafs: 8, Intangibles: Minus points for the Rogers Centre's artificial turf and dome (-2). UNI: 6.83- 8. Detroit (6.63)
The Motor City may have its problems, but sports aesthetics isn't one of them (well, except for the Lions, who really need to ditch all the black trim, go back to a conventional number font and get rid of Ford Field's roof). If a crazy quilt of rotating designs is your thing, then Motown isn't the place for you -- the Tigers, Lions and Red Wings currently have zero alternate uniforms among them. But it will do you just fine if you're in the market for a solid-looking sports town.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Tigers: 9, Lions: 3, Pistons: 6.5, Red Wings: 9, Intangibles: Minus points for Ford Field's dome (-2). Bonus point for the fist of Joe Louis, arguably the world's coolest sports sculpture (1). UNI: 6.63- 9. Dallas (6.38)
Dallas has made some strides in recent years, with the Stars returning to aesthetic respectability and the Rangers making small but real improvements. Some naysayers still complain about the Cowboys having too many inconsistent shades of blue and silver, but come on -- even the most confirmed Cowboys-hater (like, um, your friendly uniform columnist) has to admit that the team's look has earned its quirks over time.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Rangers: 6, Cowboys: 9, Mavericks: 4.5, Stars: 6. UNI: 6.38- 10. St. Louis (6.33)
St. Looey rounds out our top 10 by virtue of having baseball's best-looking team, the NFL's best-looking helmet, and a pretty-good-looking hockey team (although they'd look better if they got rid of that generic-looking alternate jersey). But imagine how much higher they'd rank if the ABA's old Spirits of St. Louis were still around!
UNI WATCH SCORE: Cardinals: 10, Rams: 4.5, Blues: 6.5, Intangibles: Minus points for the Edward Jones Dome (-2). UNI: 6.33- 11. Los Angeles/Anaheim (6.25)
The good news is that the Clippers, who were badly in need of a makeover, finally unveiled new threads earlier this summer. The bad news is that they're awful enough to drag Los Angeles out of the top 10. As for Tinseltown's other teams, most of their uniform sets are A-OK. And of course there's always the promise of adding an NFL team to the mix, since some owner or other is always threatening to relocate to L.A.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Dodgers: 9, Angels: 7.5, Lakers: 8, Clippers: 2, Kings: 3.5, Ducks: 6.5, Intangibles: Bonus point for Dodger Stadium (1). UNI: 6.25- 12. Miami (5.5)
The Heat are an interesting case. They keep rolling out one alternate uniform after another (black, white, red, sleeved, nicknames on the back, etc.), but they all look good because their core design is so strong. As for the rest of Miami's teams, they're a mixed bag. But hey, at least the Marlins have gone back to wearing their gray jerseys on the road this season. The previous two seasons, they only wore black on the road.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Marlins: 3, Dolphins: 5, Heat: 8, Panthers: 6. UNI: 5.5- 13. Minneapolis/St. Paul (4.88)
Some teams always look good, some teams swing back and forth over time, and then there are the teams that have never looked good. The Timberwolves, alas, fall into that last category -- a quarter-century of uniform futility and counting. If they'd start over from scratch, the Twin Cities would undoubtedly rise in our rankings.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Twins: 5, Vikings: 5.5, Timberwolves: 2, Wild: 7. UNI: 4.88- 14. Washington (4.5)
When people vent their frustrations with the goings-on in our nation's capital, they're usually not talking about the uniforms, but they might as well be. The Nats look hopelessly generic, the Caps' jerseys are way too busy (plus they just replaced their excellent white throwback alternate with a red throwback alternate, which is a downgrade), and the visual identity of the city's NFL team is inextricably tied to the increasingly fractious debate over its name and logo. The Wizards and their stripes are the lone bright spot.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Nationals: 3.5, Redskins: 3.5, Wizards: 7.5, Capitals: 3.5. UNI: 4.5- 15. Phoenix (4.38)
The Suns have quietly become one of the better-looking NBA teams, but Phoenix will never become a first-class uniform city until it does something about the Cardinals. There's the absurd pants piping, the silly underarm striping, the unnecessary black uni, the blood-clot look, the old-school helmet paired with the new-school uniform, and more. Blow it up and start over.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Diamondbacks: 4, Cardinals: 1.5, Suns: 7, Coyotes: 5. UNI: 4.38- T16. Cleveland (4.33)
After all the pre-unveiling hype, the Browns' new uniforms are a disappointment. Not a disaster (well, except for that big, honking "Browns" lettering down the pant legs), but definitely not an upgrade. Meanwhile, it's increasingly hard for the Indians to rationalize the use of Chief Wahoo, who sullies every uniform he touches. On the plus side, that Cavs uniform looks a lot better with LeBron wearing it, right?
UNI WATCH SCORE: Indians: 3, Browns: 4.5, Cavaliers: 5.5. UNI: 4.33- T16. Houston (4.33)
How did Houston, once home to the Astros' orange-rainbow jerseys and the Oilers' "Luv Ya Blue" design, end up with such a nondescript assortment of uniforms? Three teams, three middling designs. Nothing special, nothing awful -- just a 10-gallon hat full of "meh."
UNI WATCH SCORE: Astros: 4.5, Texans: 4, Rockets: 4.5. UNI: 4.33- 18. Denver (3.88)
You have to say this much about the Mile High City's teams: They use some interesting colors, like orange (Broncos), purple (Rockies) and sky blue (Nuggets). Too bad those hues aren't deployed to more tasteful effect.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Rockies: 4.5, Broncos: 3, Nuggets: 5.5, Avalanche: 2.5. UNI: 3.88- 19. Tampa Bay (3.0)
There's a lot of great stuff to check out in the Tampa Bay area, from Busch Gardens to Ybor City to Bern's Steak House. But jeez, the region's sports design is depressing. The Bucs have become unwatchable, the Lightning's look is uninspired, and even the Rays -- whose uniforms are serviceable and then some -- are bogged down by Tropicana Field, the nation's grimmest-looking sports facility.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Rays: 6.5, Buccaneers: 2, Lightning: 3.5, Intangibles: Major minus points for Tropicana Field (-3). UNI: 3.0- 20. Atlanta (2.67)
The Hawks' new uniforms, unveiled earlier this summer, haven't yet appeared on the court, but they're bad enough to rank among the NBA's worst. Toss in the Falcons (those striped sleeves make the jersey look like a clown costume), and you have a hole that not even the Braves can dig you out of.
UNI WATCH SCORE: Braves: 6.5, Falcons: 2, Hawks: 1.5, Intangibles: Minus points for the Georgia Dome (-2). UNI: 2.67