Don't cry, Michael, it's your birthday!
1. When you get fined
Oh, you've just been fined $75,000 large for not talking to the media? Don't worry Marshawn Lynch-MJ. You're still rich.
2. This one time, at band camp...
It feels like so long ago when "Crying Piccolo Girl" was caught on camera after Villanova lost in last year's NCAA tournament.
3. Sweet baby
Little Riley Curry-MJ wasn't too happy when her dad's Golden State Warriors got their first loss of the season.
4. Crying Brady-MJ
Who cries more than Tom Brady during Deflategate? Brady-MJ! And the tears kept flowing when the Patriots lost to the Broncos in the AFC Championship Game.
5. Knockout MJ
Not only do we get "Crying Ronda Rousey," but "Uncle Denzel" makes an appearance, starring as Holly Holm.
6. When we really thought we were gonna be rich
Don't feel bad that you didn't win the $1.5 billion Powerball in January. Powerball-MJ sums up everyone's losing numbers.
7. Because triple overtime is the worst
8. You're beautiful on the inside
You're the winner, MJ! Just kidding, you and Miss Colombia both lost the Miss Universe pageant, actually. Sorries. You're still beautiful to us. (Even when you're having as bad of a day as Steve Harvey did after the flub.)
9. Because Blair Walsh
The Vikings were a chip-shot field goal away from beating the Seahawks in the playoffs. Then, Blair Walsh happened.
10. When it's hard to be a Vikings fan
This Vikings fan's sign might be even sadder than the Vikings' loss.
11. Gateway to sadness
Now who did this? 😂 pic.twitter.com/ZfKjH9p8u7— The Sports Quotient (@SportsQuotient) January 13, 2016
When St. Louis lost the Rams, even the Arch shed a tear.
12. Sibling rivalry
It was at that moment when Eli Manning realized he no longer had more Super Bowl wins than his brother Peyton Manning-MJ.
13. When we just want to bang on the drum all day
A Look into my soul right now...but it's all good we will be back! pic.twitter.com/fKbDjGx0on— Stephen Curry (@StephenCurry30) February 8, 2016
Before the Super Bowl, Stephen Curry pumped up the Panthers by banging the drums as they ran onto the field. After the game ... well, you know. Drum-MJ lost his rhythm.