Andre Agassi would be pleased to know how much the Roland Garros press office appreciates him. The day after his stunning loss to Sebastien Grosjean -- in which Bill Clinton arrived late, having missed Double A's first set win, just in time to witness his subsequent destruction in which Andre piled up 5 games in the last three sets -- the locals appeared to be pouring more dirt into his wounds. First, by listing Agassi's history of failures at the French and then by reminding everybody that three of his four claycourt defeats this year have come at the hands of -- Surprendre! -- Frenchmen. In addition to Grosjean, they were Nicolas Thomann in Atlanta and Fabrice Santoro in Hamburg. The other immortal to drop Agassi on the soft stuff was Spaniard Alex Calatrava in Rome.

As if that wasn't enough gloating, the press release was headlined: "AGASSI CHOKES"

Oh well, at least the only man to win all four Slams on different surfaces could feel grateful he isn't the first player to be victimized by the fashionably late arrival of political royalty. (Clinton later apologized to some American journalists, saying of Agassi: "I was bad for him.")

In the 1927 Wimbledon semifinals Big Bill Tilden was leading Henri Cochet of France by two sets and 5-1 in the third when the King of Spain arrived. Shockingly, Tilden lost. Similarly, in the opening match of the 1994 Davis Cup final between Russia and Sweden, Alexander Volkov was serving for the match in the fifth set against Stefan Edberg when then-President Boris Yeltsin, obviously having concluded his rampage through the Moscow pubs, teetered in to loud and dutiful applause. Volkov lost the match and, while Yeltsin would continue to wallow in his cups, Russia went on to lose this one.

Moreover, look what's happened to other American celebs who've performed in front of Presidents: Marilyn singing for Jack Kennedy. Elvisfantasizing his DEA thing for Dick Nixon.

Andre, babe: watch your back and go easy on the peanut butter milkshakes.

Curry Kirkpatrick is a senior writer for ESPN The Magazine. E-mail him at curry.kirkpatrick@espnmag.com.