I was somewhat shocked that the hundreds of replies I received in response to the Charlotte Hornets column ran nearly 10 in favor of boycotting the Bugs for every 1 that suggested I pack up my belongings and move out of North Carolina. I had no idea how fed-up fans are with the current state of professional sports. Alas, there is no force stronger than bandwagonitis, which struck Charlotte like a hurricane. There were only 7,000 empty seats for Game 3 and Game 6 was a sellout.

In this sea of e-mails one, from a gentleman named Michael Turner, stood out for its almost artful anal obsession and truly manic use of vulgarity.

Mr. T writes:
Let's see, who won Game 3 of the Hornets-[rhymes with Bucks] series? No that's not a typo you [rhymes with sass]-licking bestial necrophiliac. I do beelieve it was the Charlotte Hornets. BEElieve is also not a typo you rectal wart. Hmmm, what other [rhymes with bull-spit] did you put in that heinously erroneous article? Larry Johnson, Alonzo Mourning and Eddie Jones moving on to bigger and better things, my [rhymes with class]. I'll admit that there were empty seats at game 3, but not quite 10,000. Actually, nowhere near 10,000. Maybe next time you'll think before you type you wombat-[rhymes with trucking] [rhymes with hit]-eater. Oh yeah, Hornets in 6.

Hornets in 6?

Now who's the necrophiliac, huh?

Michael Turner, WHO HELPED YOU LOG ON?

David Fleming, a senior writer for ESPN The Magazine, writes a weekly column for ESPNMAG.com. E-mail flemfile@aol.com.