Kenny Mayne escaped from SportsCenter. If you see him, please call (860) 766-4000.

Bob Knight paused, glared at me and said, "You've got a long way to go to be as good as your father. Keep that in mind."

I didn't flinch. "I appreciate that," I quipped.

Now the interview is long over, but my friends and colleagues are still angry -- at me. "You couldn't think of a better comeback?" they say. "'I appreciate that?' Weak."

They say I should have stood up, thrown my chair across the set, grabbed the coach by the throat and said, "Hey, Knight! What's up?!"

But I didn't. And I have to live with the disappointment and scorn of my friends and peers.

Naturally, each of them has the perfect retort -- in retrospect. The bon mots that would have earned me a place in the pantheon of wits. I could have been Jim Rome. I could have been Jim Gray. Instead, I was Jim Nabors.

The suggestions fall into several broad categories:

The cutting:
"Well, your son is already as good as you."

The sarcastic:
"Any other obfuscations you'd like to share with us, Coach Knight?"

The familial:
"My father would be happy to know you're such a fan."

The feminist:
"Sure, but how do I stack up against my mom?"

The wounded:
"You're not the first to say that."

The psychological:
"Thank you, Doctor Freud, for helping me locate the source of my insecurities."

The alienated:
"Mike Kryzewski and Steve Alford say I'm as good as my father."

The potentially suicidal:
"You haven't won an NCAA championship in 13 years. Keep that in mind."

The suggestions? I appreciate them. Really. But in the end, if I had it to do over again, I would still say "I appreciate that," and move on.

Jeremy Schaap is a correspondent for SportsCenter. His dad, Dick Schaap, hosts The Sports Reporters on Sunday mornings.