By now, fully half of the players in the major leagues today have been mentioned in some article or another as having been snubbed for All-Star selection. What can a player do to avoid being in this group of 300 or so deserving souls who will have to watch the game on their 19-inch black and white televisions like the rest of us?

My idea is a not so very radical one: with fans charged with electing the starting All-Stars, nominees should actually campaign for votes much like politicians are called on to do. With that in mind, here are 13 steps to becoming an All-Star:

1. Conventions
The trick is to get on the ballot in the first place. As it stands, this is done by becoming a starter for your respective team. It is time for that to change. For decades now, national political conventions have been uninteresting affairs in which the outcome has been a fait accompli. It was not always so. Time magazine actually printed a scorecard for the 1972 Democratic Convention in which people could note the delegate count. Can't we look to baseball to put the excitement back into conventions? At the end of every spring training, all 30 teams will hold conventions in which they announce their candidates for All-Star Game ballots. Some positions will be obvious, some will not. Silly hats will be worn. Bands will play "Happy Days Are Here Again."

	Read Jim Baker five days a week on ESPN Insider: MLB Insider Subscribe now

2. Caucuses/primaries
Of course, players don't have to wait until Spring Training to let the people know they are interested in playing in the All-Star Game. As soon as the season ends, fans in small towns in Iowa and New Hampshire will begin noticing big-league ballplayers wandering the streets of their towns. When asked what they are doing there, they can say "just relaxing after the season" or some such innocuous response. When Magglio Ordonez is found eating at the Merrimack Restaurant in New Hampshire it will be apparent that he is testing the early waters for his candidacy for the following year.

3. Campaign managers
You're a ballplayer, not a career spin doctor. Why trust yourself to run your campaign? Get a professional in there to make sure you get the exposure you deserve. What, aside from appearing in television commercials and "Old School", has James Carville done lately? Don't you think he'd jump at the chance to run Chipper Jones' outfield election bid in 2004?

4. Whistle stops
A political speech isn't really a speech unless you make it off the back of a train, is it? The trouble is, passenger trains no longer have those little observation decks on the last car that would make things possible. Chalk them up as another victim of our "would-rather-get-there-in-hours-rather-than-days" society that has been suckling at the airline industry bosom for so long. The good news is, players make so much money nowadays they can afford to buy their own railroad cars and affix them to the back of regular trains – much like wealthy industrialists used to do 100 years ago.

	Gizman

5. Kissing babies and pressing flesh
Who would you rather vote for, the shortstop who kissed your baby and shook your hand or the one who couldn't be bothered to do so? "Well," says Mr. or Ms. Voter, "Alex Rodriguez does have an OPS over 1.000, but Cristian Guzman took the time to plant one on Baby Leo. I guess he gets my nod."

6. Campaign promises
Why is it you never hear ballplayers start a sentence with the phrase, "If elected, I promise to…?" As denizens of a democratic society, we are well-used to hearing campaign promises. We love them. Even though we realize that most of them will fall victim to reality and compromise when the politician is elected, we love to hear them anyway. So, why don't ballplayers make them during All-Star election time?

"If elected, I promise to hit two home runs against the American League."

"If elected, I promise to make no fewer than two spectacular grabs of balls hit by my National League foe."

7. Sound bytes
In today's "can't-pay-attention-any-longer-than-than-ten-seconds-because-I'm-getting-there-in-hours-instead-of-days" society, the quick hitter quote is right to the point. Surely, though, All-Star candidates need to do better than these two fellows from the past in terms of enthusiasm for the opportunity:

Politics: "If nominated I will not run; if elected I will not serve." – William Tecumseh Sherman.

Baseball: "If I ain't startin', I ain't departin'." – Garry Templeton.

8. Mud slinging
Ballplayers need to know that it is not enough to tell folks why you're the man for the job, it's also important to let people know why the other guy isn't.. It would be incumbent upon candidates to make statements like this: "…by now you have seen my opponent's fielding gaffe against Toronto on the highlight shows. As he over-ran the ball and fell flat on his face were you asking yourself, "Is this the kind of man I want with a hole next to his name on my All-Star ballot?" I know I was."

9. Debates
Is it enough to let one's accomplishments speak for themselves? No! One must tout oneself in the presence of one's opponents and make pithy one-liners at their expense while they sputter in response. True, the sheer number of players involved will make actual one-on-one give and take very difficult – especially at the outfield debates which might need to be skipped altogether as it will be highly problematic to get 30 or 40 players into a debate situation.

	Tyner

10. Bumper stickers and buttons
Time was when political candidates gave away bumper stickers by the boxcar full. Not anymore. Of course, cars don't really have bumper sticker-friendly bumpers the way they used to. That not withstanding, politicians now spend their hard-won campaign contributions on television ads in which they invariably take off their sport coats and toss them over their shoulders showing they know how to relax and be the sort of devil-may-care type who is willing to be seen in his shirt sleeves. Once the jacket comes off in those ads, the sleeves must be rolled up to show that the candidate is serious about getting to work for you. Bumper stickers and their human body equivalent, buttons, are not as common as they once were. Baseball players could fill this gap by producing such items. Wouldn't you like to have a "GIAMBI FOR FIRST BASE" bumper sticker for your car or a "TIPPECANOE AND TYNER TOO" button for your lapel should the day ever arrive that Jason Tyner is on the All-Star ballot? Given baseball fans' proclivity for collecting, these items would take on a life of their own on eBay long after the All-Star elections were over.

11. Ballot stuffing
I heard a story during the 1984 season that could work as an inspiration for players looking to up their vote counts. A certain young player was just married and his new wife apparently had quite a bit of time on her hands. So, she sat down with 10,000 All-Star ballots and wrote in her husband's name. Or punched it in. I can't remember, which is why I'm not giving the player's name. I never confirmed the story so I do not wish to besmirch his name in case it was apocryphal. That, my friends, is called responsible journalism (not to mention bad memory).

Anyway, the inspiration is this: There are, sadly, places on this earth where wages are such that folks can barely live on them – and by "live" I don't mean they can't afford to get extra cheese on their phone-in orders from Domino's Pizza. These are people who make in a year what your average divorce lawyer pulls down in an hour which means not only are they poor, they can't afford to get divorced no matter how miserable they might be. Your unscrupulous would-be All Star could use this situation to his advantage. All he has to do is get hold of as many ballots as he possibly can and ship them to one of these places where he can hire about a hundred of these poor unfortunates to punch out his name all day. To help defray the costs, he can go in on the project with a couple of other players from the other league who play different positions. When they have completed about a million ballots or so, they can be shipped back to the states and submitted. Result: victory and a starting berth.

12. Dirty Tricks
Sometimes, simple ballot stuffing isn't enough. Sometimes the temptation exists to take the chicanery to the next level -- like hacking into the on-line balloting and actually changing the vote count. You didn't hear that from me, though. Besides, I'm merely pointing this out more for the benefit of those responsible for guarding against such an eventuality rather than those players who might want to try it in order to benefit their own causes Watergate style.

13. Avoiding Scandal
Will anything shock us anymore? After what we have seen some of our politicians and athletes do over the past 20 years or so, can a player commit an act so outrageous we won't vote for him for the All-Star Game? Sure. He could steal the strongbox from the local orphanage or commit arson at a puppy farm, but is our immunity such that even those outrages might be overlooked in the face of a significant number of home runs?

Yes. It is.

Jim Baker writes Monday through Friday for ESPN Insider. His weekly preview column will appear on Thursday for this weekend's games. He can be reached at jimbakerespn@yahoo.com.