Hit-by-pitch of the week
He may be a fly-ball pitcher. He may be world-renowned for his exploding fastball. But even for Randy Johnson, this was ridiculous.
|  | | A groundskeeper at Tucson Electric Park picks up what's left of a dove that was hit and killed by a Randy Johnson fastball. |
The Big Unit was just minding his own business Saturday, firing another spring-training flameball toward home plate in a game against the Giants, when a funny thing happened.
A dove made the fatal mistake of flying between the mound and home plate -- without consulting any Big Unit scouting reports first. And needless to say, moments later, this was one bird that was out for the year.
Let the hitter, Calvin Murray, describe this surreal scene, which gave new meaning to the old dead-arm stage of spring training:
"Three feet from home plate, the ball just disappeared," Murray said. "The bird just exploded. Feathers everywhere. Poof!"
The bird actually careened over the head of the catcher, Rod Barajas, and landed behind him. But the ball itself never made it to home plate, leading to one of the big dilemmas of the day: What's the call?
There's no such rule as bird interference -- although some umpires we've talked to say the ball should have been considered in play, meaning the pitch should just have been called a ball. But plate ump Alfonso Marquez eventually ruled no pitch -- or, you might say, literally a dead ball.
All we know is, for a pitch that didn't count, it might have generated more attention than any other pitch all spring.
By the next day, the Diamondbacks were glued to their clubhouse TV, watching the video, even as feathers remained scattered near home plate.
"It's the first time he hasn't three-putted all spring," Mike Morgan told the Valley Tribune's Ed Price. "He finally got a birdie."
Meanwhile in Florida, retired bullpen humorist Larry Andersen was shocked to hear about the Big Unit getting himself mixed up in a mess like this.
"It's not like Randy Johnson," Andersen told Spring Fever, "to ruffle feathers during spring training."
Name of the week
It isn't hunting season on the west coast of Florida. But for the Phillies, it is Hunter season.
The Phillies may not be leading the league in any prominent departments this spring. But nobody can catch them in one vital category: most Brian Hunters.
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Hunter Refresher
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Brian R.
Full name: Brian Ronald Hunter
Age: 33
Pos.: 1B
Previous M.L. teams: Braves, Pirates, Reds, Mariners, Cardinals
Claim to fame: Shares single-inning World Series record for most errors by a first baseman with 2, set on Oct. 23, 1999.
Career stats:
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G
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AB
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H
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HR
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SB
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Avg.
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699
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1555
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364
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67
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4
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.234
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Brian L.
Full name: Brian Lee Hunter
Age: 30
Pos.: OF
Previous M.L. teams: Astros, Tigers, Mariners, Rockies, Reds
Claim to fame: Holds major league record for most at-bats with no hits in a doubleheader (more than 18 innings) with 13, set on June 20, 1998.
Career stats:
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G
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AB
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H
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HR
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SB
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Avg.
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763
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2903
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765
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20
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241
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.264
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There's Brian R. Hunter. He's the first baseman-outfielder who used to be with the Braves (among other teams).
Then there's Brian L. Hunter. He's the two-time stolen-base champ who used to be with the Tigers, Mariners and Reds (among other teams).
They're the only two Brian Hunters in baseball. They're the only two Brian Hunters these particular Brian Hunters even know. And they're 100 percent unrelated, as far as they can tell.
"I haven't done a full-blown family-tree check," said Brian L. "But I'm planning on doing that."
Well, pending the family-tree check, these guys might as well be related, because people have been getting them mixed up all their careers.
"We even have the same nickname," said Brian R. "We both go by 'B. Hunt.' You'll hear somebody say, 'Hey, Hunt.' Or, 'Hey, B. Hunt.' And we'll both look. Then we just have to look again to see which one they really want."
"The coaches finally had to put us together in BP," said Brian L. "They just said, 'Hunter brothers, you're in the same group.'"
It's actually pretty bizarre to think these guys would ever be confused, seeing as how one of them (Brian R., at 225 pounds) weighs 45 pounds more than the other (Brian L., at 180). But seeing isn't always believing.
"I don't see how people can't tell us apart," said Brian R. "He's the skinny one. I'm the thick one. I hit lefthanded. He hits righthanded. I hit more home runs than him. But he's stolen more bases in a month than I've stolen my whole career."
Far be it for us to complain, though, because the more pandemonium these guys cause, the better a story it becomes.
"If I do something or if he does something, people are always asking me, 'Is that you?' " said Brian R. "One time he got traded, and my mom called and thought it was me. I said, 'No, mom. I'm still here.' "
But the all-time Brian Hunter tale occurred in 1994, when Brian L. got called up to the big leagues, by Houston, for the first time. A few days after he arrived, he was handed one of Brian R. Hunter's licensing checks from the players' union -- and cashed it.
"I figured it was just because I was in the big leagues," Brian L. alibied. "I always heard about the big checks players got up there. So I got a check. It said, 'Brian Hunter.' It was for more money than I'd ever gotten. So I just about spent it before I got it. I sent home money to my mom and pop. I bought a radio. I bought some clothes. I splurged. I figured I owed it to myself."
But a couple of days later, he found out that wasn't all he owed.
"They called me back two days later and said, 'Send it back,'" Brian L. reminisced. "I said, 'I can't. I don't have it anymore.' So they gave me a year to pay it back. It worked out good. He still got his check. And it was like I got free credit for a year."
Asked his reaction to all of this, Brian R. Hunter didn't appear ready to sue.
"If it were me," he laughed, "I'd have done the same thing."
Now, if these two guys can just hang on for another few days, they can join the two Bob Millers ('62 Mets) and the two Bobby Joneses ('00 Mets) as the only two unrelated teammates with the same given name ever to play on the same team. As history goes, it isn't quite DiMaggio's streak. But it's better than nothing.
"I always said," said Brian L., "it's better to be in the baseball record books than the penitentiary record books."
Magazine star of the week
The Pittsburgh Pirates have been waiting for a long, long time to get some recognition in a big-time national publication.
It's just . . . uh . . . Penthouse wasn't quite what they had in mind.
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All I care about is what Kris Benson does between the lines -- not what he does between the sheets. ” |
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— Lloyd McClendon,
Pirates manager |
But Kris Benson and his wife, Anna, had other ideas. So as you no doubt have heard by now, they're featured extremely prominently in the upcoming edition of Penthouse -- including a photo of the two embracing while topless.
Benson's teammates, naturally, found this highly amusing. So while Benson was addressing the media last week on this topic, Jason Kendall and Brian Giles marched up, took off their own uniform tops -- and hugged.
This Penthouse development also prompted the managerial quote of the spring, from Lloyd McClendon.
"All I care about," McClendon said, "is what Kris Benson does between the lines -- not what he does between the sheets."
What we're wondering, however, being the suspicious type we are, was whether Benson's elbow injury this spring can be traced to this story -- via the somewhat unheralded Penthouse Jinx.
"No, I think to qualify for that jinx, you've got to be the centerfold," teammate Terry Mulholland told Spring Fever. "I can't recall how this jinx works. But it's either the cover of Sports Illustrated or the centerfold of Penthouse. It's hard to remember which is which. There are so many sports magazines out there these days."
Bee game of the week
Seattle outfielder Scott Podsednik was hanging out in left field last weekend in a game against the Cubs when he sent a buzz through the entire park. Literally.
For reasons known only to insectkind, a humongous swarm of bees started heading in his direction -- and wouldn't take no for an answer.
"I didn't know what to do," Podsednik told the Seattle Times' Bob Finnigan. "I wanted to stand there, but then the bees kept coming, millions of them. I didn't want to delay the game, but I had to move."
At first, Podsednik tried shooing the bees away with his cap. But that didn't work. So he went for Plan, uh, Bee -- and bolted toward the warning track, as the crowd erupted in laughter and the bees flew along in hot pursuit.
"I was thinking about all those stories about killer bees," Podsednik said.
But you can forget those stories. Not only did he live, he's gotten some serious publicity out of this.
"That," said manager Lou Piniella, "will get him on 'SportsCenter.'"
Heady play of the week
Blue Jays reliever Pedro Borbon got conked on the head last week by a line drive off the bat of Royals outfielder Dee Brown. The ball then richocheted into the stands.
So the question of the day is: How was it scored?
The answers: A) Excedrin headache No. 1, and B) a very bizarre ground-rule double.
"I'm just lucky," Borbon said, "it hit me in the hardest part of my body."
Jimy Williams quote of the week
The Boston Globe's Gordon Edes reports that Red Sox manager Jimy Williams had this unique explanation last week for his team's legendary lack of a running game.
"'You can't get a ticket," Williams said, "riding a bicycle on a freeway. Can you?"
Future Secret Service agent of the week
As he was looking ahead to his prospective start next week in the first game ever at Milwaukee's new Miller Park, Brewers ace Jeff D'Amico was informed by his wife that President Bush would be throwing out the first pitch before the game.
"I think that's pretty cool," D'Amico told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel's Drew Olson. "I just hope he gets a seat behind the backstop and not in the bleachers. He might get drilled (by a home run)."
Inning of the week
It occurred Sunday in Clearwater, when the Pirates took a two-run lead in the top of the 10th inning, then sent reliever Erik Plantenberg in to pitch the bottom of the 10th. Here's what followed:
Five batters came to the plate.
Plantenberg threw 26 pitches.
None of them were swung at.
Twenty were balls.
Five straight hitters walked, forcing in two runs and tying the game.
Whereupon Lloyd McClendon pulled his team off the field, saying Plantenberg had blown by his pitch count and he was out of pitchers.
Phillies manager Larry Bowa had the option of forcing the Pirates to continue, but didn't.
"What," Bowa mused, "are you gonna do?"
Jayson Stark is a Senior Writer at ESPN.com.
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