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Monday, March 3
 
MacCulloch: Please, don't feel sorry for me

By Marc Stein
ESPN.com

He has the look of a lumberjack and a great nickname, courtesy of Team Canada brother Steve Nash.

"So you want to talk," Nash asks, "about Todd The Bod?"

That's how Nash refers to big Todd MacCulloch. He alternately calls him Todd The Bod and Toddy The Body, and Nash promises that the nicknames aren't going away.

Todd MacCulloch
Todd MacCulloch, left, may not be able to play in the NBA again due to Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease.
Not even if MacCulloch's body, in the saddest of ironies, won't allow him to return to the Philadelphia 76ers.

"I'm trying to look at things optimistically and say that he'll be able to play again, instead of thinking that the worst is yet to come," Nash said.

The cue for Nash's optimistic outlook comes directly from MacCulloch, who is refusing to wallow in despair since being diagnosed with Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease (CMT). Instead, MacCulloch is on the road with the 76ers this week, staying active in the workout room and fielding hundreds of calls and e-mails from well-wishers and fellow sufferers of the genetic disorder that, in his case, disrupts MacCulloch's balance and causes various forms of discomfort in his feet and hands.

"This has got to be so hard for him," Nash said. "But he doesn't show it. The first time I called him (after the diagnosis), he recited half of the (Ben Stiller) movie 'Zoolander.' That's Todd. He had me howling."

MacCulloch has also been diagnosed with a neurological condition -- CIDP, which stands for chronic inflammatory demyenlinating polyneuropathy -- that can lead to a gradual weakness and loss of sensation in his arms and legs. Yet MacCulloch insists that the past few months have been tougher than the past week, when there were no firm diagnoses.

There are still many unknowns, as experts say there is no specific treatment for CMT and that the symptoms can worsen or fade without warning. MacCulloch, though, cuts you off as soon he hears pity on the other line, just as Nash detailed. "Don't worry," MacCulloch says to the caller. "It's not your fault."

MacCulloch then proceeds to explain how the tingling in his feet started around the same time the season started, making it difficult just to walk up and down the stairs at home. "In training camp, even before that, I felt some weird things in my feet," MacCulloch said. "I felt tingling. I felt just very strange sensations. They weren't painful, so I didn't stop, but it was uncomfortable and I didn't really know how to explain them. So I just kind of dealt with them the best I could until those sensations sort of became permanent. When it became a 24-hour thing then I knew there was a problem."

The resulting stress and sleeplessness before the diagnosis led to the unwanted shedding of more than 20 pounds. The pounding players take in the NBA, especially the down-low pounding endured by a 7-footer, caused MacCulloch's hands to slowly start failing him, too -- the same soft hands that led Jason Kidd, during MacCulloch's season in New Jersey, to describe Todd The Bod as the best center he had ever played with.

"It's been a rough ride," MacCulloch acknowledged from the Sixers' stop in Denver, where he was accompanied by his wife Jana. "It feels a little better not having the pounding; maybe it's calmed down a bit. I'd say (the discomfort is) almost 100 percent in my feet now."

“ I've never really been in a position where people felt sorry for me. But it's just nice to know so many people care. ”
— Todd MacCulloch

At the news conference a week ago to discuss his condition, MacCulloch spoke of his "charmed life," emerging from Winnipeg, of all places, to land a six-year, $34 million contract two summers ago. MacCulloch also spoke of how he "always kind of wondered when things weren't going to go so well," but those closest to the 27-year-old say his mood has brightened considerably in the week since.

"By knowing more about what he has, I think he's let go of the feelings (from earlier in the season) of letting down his teammates and his coaches," Nash said.

Said MacCulloch: "I've never really been in a position where people felt sorry for me. But it's just nice to know so many people care."

Adversity used to be the prospect of guarding Shaquille O'Neal in the NBA Finals, MacCulloch's assignment the past two Junes. What MacCulloch faces now is obviously the real thing; Dr. Terry Heiman-Patterson, the CMT specialist treating MacCulloch, told ESPN's Sal Paolantonio last week that he "may never play again."

"I'm trying to stay as ready as I can," MacCulloch said of his workout regime. "If the symptoms improve, I want to be able to make that transition back to basketball. Even if I can't (come back), it's good to keep your muscles toned and your body healthy."

Said Toronto Raptors assistant Jay Triano, who doubles as Canada's head coach: "I've known Todd since he was 16. We talked it about this the other day, how he was told he would never even play in the NCAAs. He was told he'd never been an NBA player. Even after he made it in the NBA, he was told, 'Oh, yeah, but you'll never be a starter.' He kept making believers out of people. There's a real quiet side of him that's extremely competitive. He's going to attack this disease with the same approach and hopefully prove people wrong again."

Marc Stein is the senior NBA writer for ESPN.com. To e-mail him, click here. Also, send Stein a question for possible use on ESPNEWS.





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