espn.com Ali Contest
Joey Harrington opened the door in the current issue of Cosmopolitan when he admitted that brushing a woman's cheek drives him wild. That prompted Page 2 to examine what "turns on" other top athletes. For the regular Joes out there who are seeking amore, we also offer our exclusive "Sports Fan's Guide to the Personal Ads." COSMO JOCK | GUIDE TO PERSONAL ADS




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What made MJ want Larry Hughes? Why is Kobe jacking up 47 shots in one game? Will the Knicks be the NBA's worst team? Will the Mavs ever guard anyone? And have the Kings really closed the gap on the Lakers? Page 2's Ralph Wiley offers the answer in Raw Ball, with a little help from Road Dog, who's having trouble coping with the current state of the Knicks.

Sportoon Basketball Diaries
Scoring is up in the NFL this season, so that can mean only one thing: The ball is juiced. Ludicrous, you say? Well, our Sportoon Investigative Team has conclusive evidence that footballs are being pumped up with some strange substances. Follow the trail of "Favre beans" and "Rice cakes" to learn the real truth.
The Clippers had a crazy amount of young talent last season. Then they went out and got NBA assist champ Andre Miller to manage the chaos. So, the Clips are ready to contend, right? Not so fast, says Page 2's Charley Rosen. Yes, Miller's a heckuva point guard, but that doesn't mean his teammates are ready to follow him.

THE SPORTS GUY'S UCR SCALE
The Sports Guy had talked about his Unintentional Comedy Ratings for years, but he had never released an official UCR scale. Until now. Check out Bill Simmons' scale from Nos. 65-100 and then examine what Page 2's readers put at the top of their charts.


Earlier this week, Page 2 listed the 10 biggest cancers in NBA history, and we asked your opinion. Now we've compiled our readers' list of pro hoops' biggest troublemakers, along with a poll to crown the biggest cancer of them all.

10]  Shawn Kemp
"At least all of these other guys stay in shape."
9]  Isaiah Rider
"Everywhere he has gone, he's caused problems."
8]  Rod Strickland
"Strickland = cancer. No two ways about it."
  • GET THE FULL LIST


NFL FAVORITE LINE UNDERDOG O/U
Sunday Steelers 5 Falcons 43
Sunday Rams 6½ Chargers 44½
Sunday 49ers 6 Chiefs 51½
Sunday Packers 10 Lions 42
COLLEGE FB FAVORITE LINE UNDERDOG O/U
Saturday Miami (Fla.) 9 Tennessee NL
Saturday Oklahoma 10 Texas A&M NL
Saturday Washington St. 6 Oregon NL
All Times ET | Bold indicates home team
Complete line


 
Got a comment about something you've seen on Page 2? Here's your chance to sound off to the editors and columnists. Plus, if you'd like to send an e-mail to The Sports Guy, here's your direct link to Bill Simmons.


FOR THE KIDS
Leave the bowls and polls that give college football its unmatched drama, writes Jason Whitlock, who is tired of the self-serving pundits clamoring for a playoff system.

I HEART NEW YORK
What's all the commotion? Page 2's Jim Caple thinks New York City and the Olympics are a perfect match.

THE HOT LIST
Dan Shanoff pulled on the retro duds for this week's Hot 'n' Not List to find out why the Chargers and Irish played like duds despite looking good.

TUESDAY MORNING QB
In addition to his enlightening discourse on Election Day, TMQ offers a shocking but sure-fire cure for the epidemic of helmet-to-helmet and helmet-to-body hits.

DEEP THOUGHTS
Ralph Wiley has heard some more top-secret NFL interior monologues this week.
If your favorite writer isn't on Page 2 today, click here to check out our full roster of columnists.


They call him "Chucky," but maybe they should call him "Calvin," too. It's Bucs coach Jon Gruden, left, and Calvin of the comic strip "Calvin & Hobbes." This match was suggested by Kellye Paterson of Charlotte, N.C. Browse our archives of past pairs or click here to submit a future duo for Page 2.


 
Lakers at Wizards
8 p.m. ET, ESPN
Kobe vs. MJ.
 
Women's boxing
9 p.m. ET, ESPN2
IBA champ Laila Ali (12-0-0) vs. IWBF/WIBA champ Valerie Mahfood (13-4-0).
 
• Complete TV Listings


If you missed Page 2 over the last week, check out our back issues:
• Thurs., Nov. 7: The Official UCR
• Wed., Nov. 6: Terrible Two
• Tues., Nov. 5: Election Difficulty
• Mon., Nov. 4: Pulling Our Leg

Other featured content:
• Page 2 celebrates its 2nd birthday
• What the Heck Are They Thinking?
• Makin' It Better
• Page 2 Goes to the Movies
Weekend Edition, Nov. 8-10, 2002
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