espn.com Ali Contest
HELP WANTED: Physically fit person to entertain large crowds while wearing a giant head and fuzzy costume. Should be capable of withstanding pain all over the body, especially children beating on your "midsection." Might lose 8-10 pounds in typical workday. Must endure awful stench and possible assault. Apply within.
HRUBY: THE TOUGHEST JOB AROUND




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Why does Ben Affleck describe J-Lo as "extremely chaste"? Why did that high school ref need a picture with LeBron so badly? Can anyone make sense of the latest bizarre comments by Shaq, Phil Mickelson, Mike Vanderjagt and Bruce Froemming? Page 2 tries to provide all these answers and more in the latest edition of "What the Heck Are They Thinking?"

Jason Whitlock The Daily Quickie
Believe it or not, Page 2's Jason Whitlock says the NFL actually made progress on the minority coaching front this offseason. While he's baffled by the Dennis Erickson hiring, Whitlock says Ted Cotrell and Greg Blache were treated fairly. So what is Whitlock so steamed about? The injustice that a winner like Denny Green remains unemployed.
 Has any sports superstar fallen farther over the last few years than Shawn Kemp? The Daily Quickie ponders the plight of the Reign Man -- and whether his latest drug suspension is a simple misunderstanding. The DQ also has the latest word on the Niners, Kobe, the college hoops brawl, the Oscars and, of course, "American Idol."

PAGE 2'S OSCAR NOMINATIONS
Poor Richard Gere. The guy won the Golden Globe, but he can't even get nominated for an Academy Award. And he didn't make Page 2's list of the nominees for the 2003 Sports Oscars, either. From Chucky to Serena to Iron Mike to (who else?) LeBron, check out all the contenders.


It has infected Pat Riley, Mike Vanderjagt and umpire Bruce Froemming over the last couples weeks. It's called "foot-in-mouth disease," and it causes otherwise rational people to say very stupid things. Page 2 looks at the top 10 all-time cases of "foot-in-mouth" and asks you to vote for the No. 1.
10]  Derrick Coleman, 1994
Shortly after Kenny Anderson, the Nets All-Star guard, went AWOL for a day in Dec. 1994 and missed a Nets practice, teammate Derrick Coleman responded to reporters' questions about the incident by simply saying: "Whoop-de-damn-do. I didn't feel he owed anybody an apology."
9]  Charlie Ward, 2001
The Knicks guard touched off a firestorm in the Big Apple when his comments from a Bible study group where published in the New York Times Magazine. Among them: "Jews are stubborn;" "There are Christians getting persecuted by Jews every day;" and "They had blood on their hands."
8]  Charlie Dressen, 1951
In August 1951, with the Giants way out of the running, Brooklyn manager Charlie Dressen said, "The Giants is dead." Unfortunately for Dressen, they came back to life, erasing a 13½ game deficit to tie the Dodgers and force a playoff for the NL pennant. Nobody heard what Dressen had to say after Bobby Thomson's shot buried the Dodgers.
  • GET THE FULL LIST


VEGAS' ODDS TO WIN 2004 SUPER BOWL
Eagles 5-1   Raiders 10-1
Rams 6-1   Dolphins 10-1
Buccaneers 7-1   Packers 15-1
Steelers 7-1   49ers 15-1
Patriots 10-1   Giants 15-1
Complete line


 
Got a comment about something you've seen on Page 2? Here's your chance to sound off to the editors and columnists. Plus, if you'd like to send an e-mail to The Sports Guy, here's your direct link to Bill Simmons.


THE SPORTS GUY
It's been awhile, but The Sports Guy is back in the NBA saddle, and he's handing out scratch tickets to the lottery bound.

THE WATER COOLER
Not even the vociferous PA guys can get people excited for the NBA All-Star Game, writes Page 2's Brian Murphy. If you throw Mariah Carey in the mix -- that's a different story.

THE SPORTS GUY
You didn't think our man would skip the NBA All-Star Game, did you? His running diary covers everything from Mariah to MJ.

LEBRON BALLOONS
Prep phenom LeBron James is weighing on the minds of several NBA All-Stars, according to Ralph Wiley's Uncensored Thought Balloons.

BASKETBALL DIARY
As they rolled into the break, the Lakers appeared to have their swagger back. Charley Rosen examines if the champs are really back.

THE J-LOWDOWN
Jennifer Lopez just won big betting on the Super Bowl. Page 2's Eric Immerman reveals what happened that special day.
If your favorite writer isn't on Page 2 today, click here to check out our full roster of columnists.


It's T-Wolves forward Wally Szczerbiak, left, and actor Matthew Lawrence of "The Hot Chick." Page 2 has received 11 requests for this match. Browse our archives of past pairs or click here to submit a future duo.


Men's hoop: Virginia at North Carolina
7 p.m. ET, ESPN
Heels want tourney berth. NIT, that is.
 
Maple Leafs at Blackhawks
8 p.m. ET, ESPN2
Eddie Belfour has been brilliant.
 
Mavericks at Bucks
9 p.m. ET, ESPN
Dallas looks to bounce back from last-second loss in Minnesota.
 
• Complete TV Listings


If you missed Page 2 over the last week, check out our back issues:
• Tues., Feb. 11: Oscar Time
• Mon., Feb. 10: Sports Guy's Diary
• Fri., Feb. 7: Jenny From the Book
• Thurs., Feb. 6: Goin' Retro

Other featured content:
• Vote for best throwback jerseys
• Sex and the Super Bowl
• MJ vs. MJ commerical
• The Bad Sports Hair Hall of Shame
• 10 Burning Questions with Shannon Elizabeth
Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003
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