In honor of U2's near-guaranteed sweep at the Grammy Awards on Wednesday night -- and in light of Michael Jordan's tenuous hold on health for the rest of the season -- it's appropriate to do an analysis of how MJ's injury affects the Wizards ... and some of the rest of the world:
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"With or Without You"
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Who
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With MJ
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Without MJ
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Jahidi White
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Dominating widebody
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Chunky and slow, with no hands
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Hubert Davis
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Deadeye 3-point ace
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Tim Legler-like inability to create his own shot
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Popeye Jones
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Distinctive-looking warrior
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Just kinda distinctive looking
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Richard Hamilton
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"The Lone Ranger"
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"The Alone Ranger"
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Kwame Brown
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Protected lottery pick
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How 'bout that Tyson Chandler lately?
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Doug Collins
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Revival genius
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"Where's Marv Albert?"
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Fans at the MCI Center
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Hottest ticket in town
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Etan who?
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Jason Kidd
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Second-Most Valuable Player
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MVP lock
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Jason Williams
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A Wizards draft-day dream
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Watch those ping-pong balls!
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Jerry Krause
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Life a mockery
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Rose-ing to the occasion
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Nike
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Launch $200 kicks
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Did somebody say "sale rack"?
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David Stern
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Cliché: "What a wonderful thing for our game."
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Cliché: "Our game is as good as ever."
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NBC
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A spring ratings bonanza!
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It's all on Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
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TNT
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Wiz in permanent rotation
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"Is there still time to get Dirk on the phone?"
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Danny Wuerffel
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Just another fresh-faced recording artist
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The new "B.M.D.C."
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Jeff Skilling
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Got some PR problems
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Um, still got some PR problems
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Sarah Hughes
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Displaced Kwan ...
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... might as well replace Kwame.
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