Keep your Crowns. Save your stakes. Hold on to your handicap. The premiere of "Seabiscuit" the movie may launch a horse whose popularity peaked in the late 1930s to new 21st Century cachet, but a big box-office bet doesn't necessarily vault The 'Biscuit to the top of the animals-in-pop-culture food chain.
Win, place, showtime: "The Page 2 Derby" brings together some of the biggest animal names in pop-culture history -- equine and other -- for a winner-take-all race for glory. Check out the candidates in the Cartoon Region below, and be sure to vote! Then move to the other regions (Sports, Ads and Multimedia) by clicking on the links on the right side of the page. And hurry. The betting window closes shortly....
CARTOONS REGION
Snoopy
Claim to fame: Comic-strip, animated-TV special and merchandising titan.
Strengths: Fearless "Red Baron" persona, coupled with comprehensive Met Life insurance package.
Handicap: Good grief, the most pathetic owner in town.
Odds: 3-1
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| Marlin & Dory talk about the benefits of being in Nemo's posse. |
Nemo
Claim to fame: One of the biggest movie box-office smashes ever.
Strengths: Holds up to pressure of fishbowl existence.
Handicap: Gimpy fin and intense separation anxiety.
Odds: 100-1
Scooby Doo
Claim to fame: Helped solve countless mysteries.
Strengths: Penchant for falling through trap-doors, swinging through false bookshelves and unwittingly backing into lurking ghouls.
Handicap: The munchies; dead-weight running buddy Shaggy
Odds: 40-1
Dumbo
Claim to fame: Super-sized ears
Strengths: Ability of flight
Handicap: Scarred by vagabond life in the circus?
Odds: 22-1
Garfield
Claim to fame: Mid-1980's newspaper-funnies sensation
Strengths: Quick wit; pushover for owner
Handicap: Laziest cartoon animal ever
Odds: 500-1
Bugs Bunny
Claim to fame: Wise-cracking, carrot-chomping figurehead
Strengths: Consistent ability to slip out of trouble
Handicap: Cross-dressing (for German opera send-ups)
Odds: 5-1
Wile E. Coyote
Claim to fame: Perpetual losing end of chase for Road Runner
Strengths: Connections with mysterious "Acme" corporation
Handicap: Constantly running off cliffs, being flattened by boulders
Odds: Holds up sign Yipe!
Mickey Mouse
Claim to fame: Icon
Strengths: Bi-coastal theme-park empires; posse of cartoon friends
Handicap: Minnie constantly asking for things
Odds: 3-1
Dan Shanoff is a columnist for Page 2. His "Daily Quickie" column appears every weekday morning.
