What if your parents ended up spending a train journey with mega-famous soccer stars but had no idea who they were? Well, what follows is a beguiling yarn spun on Twitter by Nate Patrick, a FIFA 19 and E-sports commentator whose mother and father had the pleasure of bumping into a train full of Manchester United players.
To set the scene a little, Nate was obsessed with football while growing up in Australia but it's fair to suggest that his immediate family don't share his passion for the game. Anyway, this weekend Nate's parents happened to be on a train in England when they sent a message to their son on the other side of the world.
The pair had become slightly annoyed by a boisterous game of cards being played further along their carriage and then utterly bemused when one of the party came across to apologise.
They were on a train, and a group of people were behind them, playing Uno.Mum and Dad turned around a few times, as apparently they were making a little bit of noise. Yes my parents get disturbed by an exciting card game, now you can see I don't think they'd cope with Wembley. - Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
These lads knew they were making a bit of noise, so they come up to Mum and Dad, and apologise, and ask if they'd like a photo.Dad is like, oh, that's nice, and gives one of the gentleman his phone for this stranger to take a photo of Mum and Dad on this train from Manchester. - Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
The stranger looks weirdly at my Dad, at says (with a French accent) "No, no no, I am asking if you would like a photo with me, sir?"My Dad looks at my Mum like who on earth does this guy think he is? But also my Dad is mega-polite, and obliges to be in the photo. - Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
You don't have to be a Hollywood script writer to guess where this particular vignette is heading.
Having read through all of these messages, my Dad sends through the photo, and asks "Nathan, you wouldn't happen to know who this is?".- Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
Nate was well and truly taken aback by his father's ambivalence toward Pogba and the rest of the United squad.
IT'S PAUL BLOODY POGBA pic.twitter.com/UhFm0qZBiN- Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
(Also, that's only Nemanja Matic standing there with Pogba.)
MY DAD ASKED PAUL POGBA TO TAKE A PHOTO OF HIM AND MY MUM- Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
THE NOISY UNO HOOLIGANS AREN'T LOUD UNIVERSITY STUDENTS ON THEIR WAY TO WATCH A FILM IT'S THE MOST FAMOUS FOOTBALL TEAM ON THE PLANET YOU STUPID STUPID GORGEOUSLY IGNORANT ADORABLE STUPID PEOPLE THAT I DESCENDED DIRECTLY FROM- Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
Nate then continued to post a series of screenshots of the WhatsApp conversation he held with his parents in which he desperately attempts to convey that "the odd man with the red crocodile skin luggage" is, in fact, a fairly well-known World Cup-winning footballer.
Despite their son's vehement protestations, mum and dad remained unmoved by their brush with stardom and instead got back to the more important matter of photographing dogs.
They are now sharing photos of a dog they saw after they got off the train, so I think it's safe to say they've moved on.Thank you for your time. Football, eh? ⚽️❤ - Nate Patrick (@N8NathanPatrick) 20 January 2019
Amazing, isn't it? Not that Nate's parents didn't recognise Pogba and his audacious luggage, but that there are still some people out there in this big, wide world whose lives aren't utterly dominated by football.