Mechelle Voepel

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Thursday, August 22
 
Nothing's ever as simple as it seems

By Mechelle Voepel
Special to ESPN.com

First off, there were some folks none too happy about the two Game 3s of the WNBA conference semifinals being on Oxygen, since they don't receive the network. Oxygen's goal, of course, is to put itself in such demand that pretty much everyone will get it, and the WNBA perhaps aided that.

Margo Dydek
Margo Dydek and Utah look to dethrone the Los Angeles Sparks.
The Oxygen-deprived WNBA fans don't care about the reasons, and that's understandable. One man e-mailed to say he'd watched all the other playoff games with his daughter, and it was a travesty they couldn't see the decisive New York-Indiana and Utah-Houston matchups because they didn't get Oxygen.

(If he does start getting it, though, I'd advise him to send his kid to the fridge during commercials so she doesn't see those promos for idiotic movies like "Overexposed,'' where knuckleheaded women have affairs with videotaping psychopaths.)

Others e-mailed a different concern, though. They'd be willing to put up the ol' rabbit ears, string aluminum foil, hold hands and wear spoons on their heads -- ala "Laverne and Shirley'' trying to get the broadcast of Lenny and Squiggy on the "Dating Game'' -- if it would let them receive a station that does the WNBA games without any analysis by UConn grads.

But anyway, let's hope most of TV's UConn attention now goes to the ex-Huskies player who's still in the playoffs: Ashja Jones of the Washington Mystics, who face New York now in the Eastern Conference finals.

Anyway, as long as we've already mentioned Squiggy ... David L. Lander lends his distinctive voice to a cartoon called "Oswald the Octopus,'' a friendly mollusk who doesn't live in the water like pretty much every real, live octopus but rather in an apartment in a cute city that has some buildings shaped like ice-cream cones.

Lander is Henry the Penguin, and the other day there was an episode called "The Sleepover,'' where Oswald and his dog, Weanie, spent the night downstairs at Henry's apartment. There wasn't much dramatic plot development -- Weanie expertly solved the problem of Henry's using too many nightlights by fetching sunglasses for himself and Oswald -- but my 4-year-old nephew was rapt in attention.

And I even found myself charmed by its simplicity.

Which reminds me of something I've heard lots of basketball coaches and players say after they've won: "You know, if you execute right, it really is a pretty simple game.''

This is not something you hear about every sport. For instance, golf -- whose practitioners talk as if it's more challenging than brain surgery -- is never referred to as simple. Even though the ball doesn't move until you make it, nobody gets in your way and everybody has to be really quiet whenever you're doing anything.

But basketball? Players hardly ever brag about how difficult it is. If anything, players think if they do it right, it should be simple.

If I just move my feet on defense ... if I take the right kinds of shots ... if I just don't try to force anything ... if I just let the game come to me.

I've never really known what that last one means, but it must mean something because everybody says it.

But, alas, what appears simple is not always so. For instance, my mom doesn't understand why the Utah Starzz ever lose a game.

"They've got the 7-foot girl,'' she says. "She's bigger than anybody else. How can anyone beat them?''

I explain that while 7-2 Margo Dydek blocks and alters tons of shots and pulls down lots of rebounds and is having a really good season, other players do figure out ways to score against her and try to defend her. It's not like anyone says, "Oh, well, you're 7-2. I give up.''

In fact, as many advantages as Dydek might have, she doesn't have speed nor does she get the benefit of the doubt a lot of the time when she ends up elbowing somebody in the noggin because she didn't even see them.

Of course, any explanation of why the 7-2 person doesn't always win is somewhat fruitless because my mom -- whose idea of pressure situations is defined by having spent years as an emergency-room nurse -- also doesn't quite understand why people clank free throws, miss 5-foot putts or strike out.

So I usually just end of saying, "It isn't as easy as it looks.''

And yet, the other night against Houston, Dydek did make some things look easy. Beautifully simple, in fact. Specifically, the high-low game. I mean, can you beat having a 7-2 player making swift, efficient passes to teammates for open layups?

Dydek, who was the WNBA's top draft pick back in 1998, really has had a good season and maybe has found that, indeed, when you're 7-2 you have an opportunity to take huge advantage of the truly simpler aspects of basketball.

It doesn't mean the game is easy for her, and it especially won't be with the multi-talented Los Angeles Sparks star Lisa Leslie to face next. But the resolve of Dydek and the Starzz really showed in their ability to come back strong after the tough second-game loss at Houston.

Utah is hardly a team of unknowns. Along with the tallest player, they have two other 2000 Olympians in Natalie Williams and Jennifer Azzi (Dydek played for Poland in the Sydney Games).

They have three players who've won NCAA basketball championships in Azzi, Adrienne Goodson and Semeka Randall. They have one of the quickest players in the game and a budding star in Marie Ferdinand.

Yet, especially compared to L.A., New York and Washington, Utah gets little regular-season TV exposure. We've don't know about the franchise's future. We don't know if people out there are still wondering if the "Starzz'' is/are singular or plural. (It's plural, of course.)

We figure most folks think L.A. has too much depth and talent and will win this series. But ...

If Utah's starters can keep up their high-level play, and the bench can give the Starzz just a little more, and L.A. has a couple of those crazy-shooting games, Utah does have a chance.

But let's see what Sue Bird, Swin Cash and Tamika Williams think about that ... ha-ha, just kidding.

Mechelle Voepel of the Kansas City Star is a regular contributor to ESPN.com. She can be reached at mvoepel@kcstar.com.





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