| | | The baseball trading deadline is one week from today, and Page 2 readers are already wheeling and dealing.
Check out today's "Meat Market" classified ads -- our listings of what fans are willing to unload from their favorite ballclubs and what they're looking for in return.
But before hitting the market, you might want to bid on today's featured item.
Featured ad of the day
 ATHLETICS FAN willing to give up perennial All-Star, clutch-hitting, slugging, future Hall of Fame, RBI machine who is also a law-abiding clubhouse leader, community supporter, and a team-rallying man filled with childlike laughter and who enjoys playing with his brother. Let's make a deal. (Yankees, take special note: We are interested in a deal. We know you have all sorts of players and cash, neither of which you will need for your 2001 championship season anyway, so apply now.)
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DEVIL RAYS FAN will part with a slugging All-Star OF in exchange for young starting pitching. Greg Vaughn, a 2001 All-Star and former 50-homer slugger can be yours. He can help your playoff-bound team through the postseason, as he has been to the World Series before (Padres). Willing to also deal for a young shortstop or closer.
INDIANS FAN tired of playing games with no-long term commitment. Recently, I've had to deal with pitchers who could only put things together when it was already too late (not to mention their tempers). Now, I'm looking for someone to start anew. I've got a few good kids that would love to move into your place and can definitely help out in the long run. All I ask is seven innings and less than four runs, but I can't afford the rich lifestyle right now.
MARINERS FAN willing to give up 10-regular season wins in exchange for power-hitting LF.
ORIOLES FAN looking to trade a pitcher in exchange for ANY young, power hitting OF or closer. You get your choice of Sidney Ponson, a young 24-year-old fireballer who just needs to learn how to command his pitches better, or the almighty Jose Mercedes/ Melvin Mora tag team. Jose was one of the top pitchers in the majors after the All-Star break last year. He won't disappoint, guaranteed. Special bonus! Billionaire owner included in any deal! The perfect opportunity for all you small-market clubs to get that extra boost of cash you'll need to sign free agents this winter. Call now!
YANKEES FAN willing to give up the farm for one (or two) more years of glory. The young talent that we have (Nick Johnson) would make your team a certain winner when we can no longer be one. Teams that are promising now could be down-right scary in a couple of years (are you listening you Giambi-toting A's). If you act now, we can throw in a proven second baseman and outfielder, Chuck Knoblauch. The fun never ends with Chuck. Watch him hit Olbermann's mom from second, or watch him throw out a runner with a frozen rope from left field. Cashman is standing by!
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WHITE SOX FAN looking for young LHP with a healthy back and a clean-shaven face in exchange for a power-hitting 1B/OF. Paul Konerko comes cheap, is consistently improving, and has untapped potential in the field. John Halama, or best offer.
RED SOX FAN willing to trade solid second/third starter and promising young bat for young, questionable pitcher with stuff similar to Pedro's. Will give up "ol' reliable" Frank Castillo and "Karate Kid" Izzy Alcantara (very promising) for Ramon Ortiz. (Once Pedro takes Ortiz as an apprentice Ramon will be unstoppable!). Also want to trade rookie sensation Shea Hillenbrand for anybody who can take a strike.
RED SOX FAN seeking Jason Giambi. Come on, you know you want to play here. You'd be the king of the world, and you'd get a ring. Think that'll happen in Oakland? Nope. And listen, Mr. Beane, we're gonna give you slightly more than you'd get after the season ends, which would be nothing. We'll give you a Stetson with a little Ohka or Crawford thrown in.
INDIANS FAN willing to part with promising, young 3B/LF with power for a starting pitcher. You get Russell Branyan, a hard-hitting, table-clearing youngster who will add pop to the middle of any lineup. Though he's hitting below .250, his power more than compensates. Looking for a starting pitcher who will last more than five innings per start. Preferably one who won't give up over five runs in that amount of time as well.
YANKEES FAN looking to make blockbuster trade that puts Jason Giambi and Jonny Damon in pinstripes in return for veterans Tino Martinez, Chuck Knoblauch, plus Ted Lilliy and blue-chip minor-league 1B Nick Johnson.
TWINS FAN in search of right-handed reliever without the Bob Wells-like propensity to give up the gopher ball. Will part ways with J.C. Romero or Johann Santana, two left-handers who can reach the low 90s with a fastball, plus they enjoy quiet dinners and long walks on the beach.
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MARINERS FAN willing to give up a proven right-hander and a young "arm" for a .290 hitter with some power (20+ homers) who also can throw some leather in LF. You get Brett Tomko and either Gil Meche (RH starting pitcher) or Brian Fuentes (LH long reliever or set-up man). Might even throw in left-hand hitting .260 hitter (Al Martin). K.C., are you listening?
BLUE JAYS FAN willing to part with four extremely capable starting pitchers (Esteban Loaiza, Steve Parris, Chris Michalak, and Joey Hamilton), one of whom was the team's No. 1 pitcher going into this season. In return, asking for a combination of any of the following: a proven starter or four who won't fade down the stretch, a catcher who hits over .220 or anyone on the left side of the infield who has seen Tom Emanski's videos and can put them into practice. Will also accept cash for these players, preferably American cash.
ORIOLES FAN in search of young, power hitting OF to build team around. Willing to part with a quality young starting pitcher and decent utility man for this. You heard it here first: YOUNG STARTING PITCHING! S. Ponson, J. Johnson, and J. Mercedes, any can be had given the right player. J. Conine is also available, no reasonable offer refused! If you have a Magglio Ordonez or a Jermaine Dye, please call and make an offer. A "train wreck" just hit our lot and all merchandise must be liquidated for continued rebuilding!
ATTENTION YANKEE HATERS: Do you have quality players wasting away on losing teams? Tired of seeing the Yanks win it all every year? Let's all join together to make sure it doesn't happen again this year. All it takes is a power-hitting LF, and the Mariners will make sure the Yanks are home with you this fall. Think of the pride you will feel as your guy strikes a blow for all the little teams out there who watch their players bought up by the Yankees. No future Hall of Famers needed, but thanks for your interest, Mr. Griffey.
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| NATIONAL LEAGUE LISTINGS |
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BRAVES FAN looking for a 1B with a pulse, preferably someone who won't be collecting Social Security in the near future. A particular left-handed 1B who plays in the Bay Area and already has an "A" on his head would work. Willing to give up a great young LHP (Odalis Perez), a 1B prospect (Wes Helms), another prospect (George Lombard) and a veteran RP (Kerry Lightenburg).
CUBS FAN seeks significant yet moderately priced acquisition for stretch drive ("significant" meaning not of the Felix Heredia or Matt Karchner mold). Ideal candidate will be a left handed power hitter who can play CF or possibly 1B (Steve Finley, Chicago is beautiful this time of year). In return, we offer a rotund/dominating AAA pitcher named Quevedo (he could be Jeremi Gonzalez under a different name) and a light-hitting career minor-league SS named smith. Serious inquiries only.
DODGERS FAN willing to give up a slick-fielding SS, fireballing young reliever and a speedy CF along with a minor-league C who might need a change of scenery for a CF or SS who can hit leadoff. You get Alex Cora, who one might compare to Rey Ordonez, but without the hefty contract, Tom Goodwin, who could kickstart an offense if he ever learns to bunt, Kris Foster, a hard-throwing closer-type who has some history of arm troubles, and Angel Pena, who if you overlook the physique, could turn into an offensive threat behind the plate. In turn, we are looking for a Shannon Stewart-type or a Neifi Perez to help us keep up with the D'Backs.
EXPOS FAN will trade expensive closer for four top prospects. You get Ugueth Urbina, a proven veteran closer who might or might not be healthy. In exchange, we get four prospects. On second thought, just give us three ... no, two ... no, one minor-league journeyman and $5,000 Canadian.
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PIRATES FAN will trade John Vander Wal for pitching prospect (left-hander preferred). Offering Jason Kendall to Oakland in exchange for Jason Giambi (this reduces your payroll and keeps him from becoming a Yankee). Finally, will trade 1B Kevin Young for two buckets of balls and a case of beer (imported preferred but this point is negotiable).
REDS FAN (SHHH ... NOT SO LOUD) looking to unload slick fielding 2B/SS for a cheap, young, prospect with a low salary, who will become an All-Star by the 2003 season. In return, you will receive a man named Pokey, which a good enough bargain in itself, who fields like a mixture of Robbie Alomar and Ozzie Smith. His contract is also up at the end of the year, but he is only looking for $10 million. Give us a call. We're ready to deal! Everything must go!
ROCKIES FAN having a fire sale, starting with flavor of the week LFs. Looking for big bats, preferably players who swing them at the ball. Any position will suffice, rover would be preferable. In exhange, you will recieve error-prown, powerless has-beens that never were, ranging from LF to 2B. Willing to trade any overpaid SP or reliever for players without hollow stats (ie.. good average, OBP, SB, etc.. but leave all game-winning or tying runs on base, never advance runner, hit into inning-ending double plays) again, will accept any position. If you act now, I'll throw in another underachieving manager.
PIRATES FAN willing to part with experienced RF, 2B and 1B in exchange for starting southpaws and a base-stealer with a solid OBP. 1B Kevin Young has a decent bat well-suited for a long career as a DH. 2B Pat Meares and RF Derek Bell have gloves in good condition, and Bell's baggy uniform pants fit five adults comfortably. A real steal -- $15 million of veteran talent for bargain prices!
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METS FAN looking to unload a catcher who makes a bunch of money. Comes with a big bat, crazy blond hair, and attitude (he is not afraid to sport a mullet or a fumanchu goatee). With him, you will get all the long-distance calls you need for free (and only 99 cents each minute after 20) and don't worry. ... he doesn't care if you steal from him. Looking for pitching depth and a power bat in return. Please reply to 10-10-2-Piazza.
PHILLIES PHANS will part with good middle relievers for service of quality starting pitcher. Take your choice of either Ricky Botallico, Rheal Cormier, or even Randy Wolf. If pitchers aren't your slice of pie, then we also have a pretty talented 3B. This guy named Scott Rolen, perhaps you have heard of him? Well it doesn't look like he'll get signed so ... why not trade him? Desperate for starting pitching! Willing to settle for less.
PHILLIES PHOR SALE: 3B is in need of a good home. He needs a nice home with a lot of grass (not near-grass) and a big yard to run around in. Doesn't really talk too much and needs every Sunday off. Seeking a power hitter who hits higher then .270 (we have seven of those already). Amenities include brand new stadium (2004), new practice facility (well, it belongs to the Eagles, but they let us use it). And a world champion NBA team (well, almost).
METS FAN willing to trade superb-fielding SS or underachieving 1B for Mark McGwire rookie card. Willing to throw in $$ to complete the deal.
CUBS FAN desparately seeking left-handed power-hitting 1B. Preferrably a reigning AL MVP. Willing to trade hot prospects, such as Corey Patterson or Hop Soi Choi. Sign and trade preferrable (two month rentals welcome, but not smiled upon). Will also send prematurely printed "McGriff" Cubs jerseys.
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