From a Drexel frat house to the big house?

What the heck were the frat brothers who allegedly masterminded the "Pick Six" horse-racing scandal thinking?

A. "There hasn't been a sure thing like this since Rachel of the Chi Omegas."

B. "This was our most ill-conceived idea since the grain alcohol punch party."

C. "Maybe we shouldn't have punctuated each transaction with the secret fraternity handshake."

D. "We should have put the time to more constructive uses, like slipping GHB to sorority alumni."

E. "Back in college, our house won intramural championships in hoops, flag football, and hacking."

F. "All of a sudden the 'sheep initiation' doesn't sound so bad."